1st Anniversary

It’s almost 1 year since I lost my partner suddenly. Every day at the moment feels like a struggle. I cry so much as I just want to be with my lovely Patrick my best friend. The thought of the 1st Anniversary of that terrible day just brings it all back to me. Im Hurting so much without him.

Dear Margaret1
I am so sorry for your loss, the pain just doesn’t go away. I lost my lovely husband on 13 Jan to covid and have faced many 1sts since then, leaving me weak & weeping. His birthday on 10 March, our 30th wedding anniversary on 15th March, first time at shops, first time fuelling up car since he last done it. I was ill recently & first time he wasn’t there to be the best, most patient & thoughtful nurse. So many 1sts to get through.
Your 1st anniversary I know would be extremely painful & nothing can make it better or hurt less. Weren’t we so lucky to be so loved? Some people have never had that xx

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Dear Margaret
I know exactly how you feel. My husband died in June last year and everything you said resonates with me. The pain is excruciating and there’s no relief. I wish I could say something to help you, but I can’t help myself so don’t know what good I can do for you. Writing on here helps a little, but apart from that, I think it is probably a case of one step, then another, until maybe one day, it will be easier. That’s my hope for you, me, and everyone in our position. We are not alone, which is something, but that in itself is sad because it means there are others who feel like we do. Hugs x


Dear Margaret,
So sorry for your loss, I lost my husband on the 20th December & it still seems so unreal to me. We were together for 23 years. I truly know as we all do on this site what a broken heart feels like.
I have yet to do all the firsts that the majority of people think will be tough but as Maigret says it is all the firsts we encounter that used to be done as a couple that are heart wrenching doing alone
Take care & stay strong


Hi Margaret /AnnR

I too lost my husband of over 40 years last June. At times I think I have gone worse not better but when I read what the newly bereaved are saying on here I realise I have improved. Progress is so slow because of the loneliness and all the wonderful memories.

Going forward seems impossible without my soul mate but he would not want to see me sad, I know that as I think we all do on this site. So first anniversary of his passing coming up, I figure it can’t be as bad as the day he died.

Lots of hugs to all of you x

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My heart goes out to you I really feel your pain. It was a year on 19th April that I lost my darling Dave he was 47 years old and had only been I with cancer in the lung, in the spine and in the brain 6 weeks before he passed it was a bolt out of the blue. I is our 25 wedding anniversary on Monday 17th May 2020 and we had arranged to renew our wedding vows but that won’t happen now. I am a widow but I’m also still married to my darling soulmate and I will always be I know our wedding vows said till death do us part but I believe our vows last an eternity. Take each day at a time and grieve in your own time and own way. I can’t say it gets easier because to be honest I feel it’s got harder his family and friends have moved on and I’m supporting our 22yr old daughter hoping she won’t crack cause she was so close to her dad and she won’t go and get help. Keep on going at your own pace if you are tired then rest just do things at your own pace. Take care of yourself because he would want you to, the community here are so supportive because unfortunately we are all in the same situation. God bless and take care I’m here if you need to offload xx


Hi there im so so sorry for all your horrendous losses it’s heartbreaking I lost my soulmate of eighteen years together I’m absolutely heartbreakon all our hopes and dreams have been stolen from us in the most cruellest harrowing manner I’ll never comprehend any of this never ever
In my thoughts

I’m so sorry for your loss I agree it is the most horrendous pain ever. I lost my dad 20yrs ago to a heart attack and my mum 6yrs after that to cancer and the pain of losing them was awful but at least I had my husband and soulmate Dave by my side but when he died last April age 47 from multiple cancer’s that were only diagnosed 6 weeks before he passed it was as if my heart has been ripped away. I’m totally lost without him we had 25yrs together but that wasn’t long enough and to be honest I’m totally lost without him and on 17th may 2021 which is our 25 wedding anniversary we were supposed to be renewing our wedding vows but that won’t happen now. Take care and grieve at your own pace. We are all here for you God bless xx


Hi there im sorry to hear about your losses it’s heartbreaking
Yes this pain is unbearable im utterly truamatised witnesing it all happen in front of my eyes he was scared im lost alone broken empty keep looking around for him pining for my Soulmate
Im sorry you never got to renew your vows it’s so sad
We were kids when we met I was 21 going on 22 my Beautiful innocent brave brave courageous man was only 39 we had planned to grow old together everything has gone im just existing second by second it’s getting harder than ever
Thankyou for your kind words means alot take care stay safe xx :broken_heart: