My wife died just 2 weeks and 6 days ago after a very short illness (lung cancer which had metastasised all over). Her funeral was Friday. We were married for 37 years. She was only 60. The pain is so hard that I sometimes cannot breathe. We were inseparable. I can’t function. Crying all the time. Just felt the need to reach out to see if anyone has any word of help please x
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Hello Lee - so sad to hear your plea for help, I know exactly how you are feeling- I lost my beloved gorgeous husband suddenly unexpectedly 10 weeks ago. No one understands how we are feeling, friends rally round but they’re not the ones who has lost the absolute love of their Life their best friend the centre of the whole world - suddenly it’s all gone, no tomorrow to look forward to only sadness and loneliness- I know how your feeling, your not on your own in the struggle
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Hello Lee
I am sorry to hear your wife has died
and I felt like that just after my husband died. It is now only just feeling different for me and still have awful days.
My husband died last year in November. I count the number of days.
Being with my son and young grandsons helps.
I am remembering all the time everything we would have been doing wherever I go. I am gradually getting a bit more confident but get overwhelmed at times. Gardening helps me
I feel I am trying to carry on as he wouldn’t have liked it if I didn’t.
I always told him I would carry on and I knew what he had wrong with him would get him in the end. I m not sure of tips but I used to sing to calm myself.
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sorry to hear of your loss. i lost my hubby of 47 yrs easter 22 within 12hrs of becoming ill. It is getting a bit better but it is still a shock and devastating. you will find lots of comfort and support on here. hugs xx
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Hi lee
I lost my partner tragically whilst on holiday in mexico 8wks ago i know what your feeling i cry most days the house is empty all the time i know its hard mate on here there are lovely oeople to talk to that will help us big hug from me
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Hi Lee, I’m sorry about the loss of your wife.
My husband suddenly died 12 weeks ago today and i understand how you are feeling. Ive been told that whatever im feeling is okay and not to feel guilty. Keep talking and reaching out. Take care.
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Hi lucys
I totally agree with you mines only been 8wks since her passing i feel for lee so much griefing guilt emptyness crying etc im trying hard but like lee finding it very hard
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@Lee1867 I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my partner unexpectedly 22 weeks ago.
I found in the early days everything that happened was so overwhelming. I was crying all the time and did not know how I could carry on. But I did and am slowly starting to learn how to live with the grief.
Just take things one day at a time. That’s how I have learned to cope. Don’t think too far ahead it’s too painful. It’s not easy but you will get there.
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I am so sorry for everyone’s loss. My husband died 4 weeks ago and I feel as if half of me has been ripped away. We had 26 years together and did so much, my life feels completely empty without him. I just don’t know how I can move on as he would want me to. The pain is overwhelming. When will it start to get easier?
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I’m so thankful for all your kind and warm replies. My heart goes out to you all in your loss. To know there are others who understand, truly understand, is comforting. I wish you didn’t have to go through it though. As I write tears are falling again x
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Im crying too. I feel for you. I do hope you get comfort from others on here. I have only just joined and hope that i can too. X
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Im very sorry for your loss and what you are going through. I dont know when it will get easier, ive been told i will just learn to live with the loss and grief. Keep reaching out on here and talking. Xx
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I have found knowing others are experiencing the same feelings and emotions on this forum so reassuring
There is no timeline as to when things will get better. I find it’s still a rollercoaster of emotions, but some days are now easier than others.
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Hi harvey
I felt the best way is to cry where ever i may be some people think being a man you are not allowed to show ur feelings they think
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Thank you Jeff1. I shouldn’t have put my name as Harvey, very confusing. I am female, Harvey was my husband’s beloved dog! Thank you and everyone else for your support.
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I feel for all of you. I’m 57, my partner was 49 when he died suddenly and unexpectedly while out on a bike ride one Sunday in January.
The beginning is harsh, constant pain, feeling my heart was being ripped out. Sobbing uncontrollably, raw raw pain that I thought would never ease.
22 weeks in I’m sitting in my own in a coffee shop in town, never done it before but it’s not too bad, quite relaxing actually.
The raw pain has gone, I cry still every day but just a few tears and it’s over again. I’m back at work part time and getting in with every day.
Do I miss him, of course. Do I wish he was here, absolutely. But he isn’t and I need to live my life, all be it different to what we planned.
My life will never be the same but mine isn’t over, unfortunately. Small steps one day at a time and see where this path leads.
Some days awful, some days easier, some days are good and I didn’t think I’d be saying that at the start of this new journey
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Ali
I can identify with what you said.
Sometimes it is okay to sit alone. I used to do it when we were married. I still think I am married even though I am a widow.
We were never in each others pockets.
Yes I still cry almost every day.
I have been alone since last mid November.
I am gradually learning to do things on my own he did.
Or decide not to bother.
Put his old gardening coat on a d found his used hanky in the pocket. Put it back again. Spose I will wash it one day. The. What! Polish his headstone with it when I finally decide what to put on it.
He was so old fashioned no one these days much uses handkerchiefs do they?
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Harvey
When will it start to get better you asked ?
When it was four weeks for me looking back (now nearly
10 months).
I can’t actually remember unless I re read what I felt.
It isn’t better I just am getting used to it not being better like not being surprised.
Morning
We were quite a postive pair together she was very stubborn u ask when will it get better the qustion is will it ever get better people keeo telling me time heals you as ive previously wriiten my wife passed 13yrs ago of cancer and was single for a few years then met joanne me and joanne only had 4 yrs together then bang she was taken away from me aswell so time can heal you it all depends on the person
Reading the comments on here couples have been together many yrs so it will be alot harder for them than me i think still terribke what has happened but sorry the clock is not gonna stop for nobody ,its only been over 8wks now but know like i did with my wife full into that dark hole like i did with her passing hitting the bottle like i did i would not be here now speaking to people having grief therapy pulled me through
Stay postive stay strong easier said than done but shout scream swear it will help and dont be frightened to people yiur feelings
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