6 months on

I haven’t been on in a while so feel like I’m starting again.

Its been 6 months since I lost my mum to bowel cancer. Which in recent weeks has brought it all up again with the bowel babe stuff. Which I do think it’s amazing what she I doing.

Even now 6 months on I still feel very numb. I still don’t know how I have managed 6 months without my mum. I’ve had counselling it helped a little bit. Gave me chance to tell my side of the story as my family never really ask me about it. I have feelings in me which I didn’t know I had. One being guilt.

In the last 6 months I keep getting poorly with bugs and colds. Even now during a heat wave I have a cold. I was just seeing if anyone else has experienced this.

It is a struggle every day still which I know is still early days. But it’s hard as a lot of people have turned there back on me. Not many people talk about my mum either which I struggle with. Where I bring her up all the time.

This grief journey is not easy


I think we all have had experience of people moving on and certainly everyone discovers emotions we didn’t know existed!
For a time when my husband was no longer mentioned, I felt real anger & wondered if people had so little respect for him or myself. I realised it was their problem not mine.

I think your body is reacting to the shock, grief takes on many guises. But if concerned don’t rule out an appt with doctor.
G. X

Yeah I have been to doctors had blood tests and stuff all came back clear.

I guess your right I feel anger when no one mentions my mum but then in the next breath people but stuff on Facebook and that winds me up more. People are hard to understand.

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Hi I have those bugs and colds lasting and coming back. Your immune system takes a battering when your in grief. And sleep can be affected which doesn’t help. I have been coughing and sneezing even in this hot weather.

After my mum died, one of her best friends talked about the ‘exhaustion of grief’ and it really struck a chord with me. The full weight of the grief is so heavy that sometimes I feel I can hardly put one foot in front of the other. I get tired muscles and general exhaustion all the time, even 18 months after mum died. I think getting ill and run-down is part of the same thing. Grief is such an overwhelming thing to have to bear and manage that it takes its toll physically as well as emotionally.