A tough day

Today was the toughest day since my husband passed away in April. Charlie was only 52. We have been together since we were 19 & were looking forward to another 30 years. Charlie was diagnosed with Advanced Bowel Cancer in April 2021 and passed away 2 days from the 2 year diagnosis date.
Getting out of bed is tough every day but none more than today, nothing different has happened but it was just tough.
Foolishly I then decided to put his coats in storage bags which resulted in the kids finding me lying on the coats on the floor in tears. Coats are now back in the cupboard.
Nothing prepares you for this loss & how to get through the day. I set myself small tasks which we call big wins as what was once an everyday task is now massive- took me 4 weeks to put the duvet cover on the duvet as Charlie always did that.

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@Niknik71
I’m so sorry you have had to join this community. Everyone on here will be.
We are all have our own unique grief stories, and are at different points on the journey.
But we all share similar feelings, and similar challenges in negotiating each day, or even each next hour sometimes.
It’s 9 months 13 days since I lost my husband, nothing is any easier, harder to be honest.
I only found this site a few weeks ago, but it has helped me to see others who share my feelings, and ‘get’ me.
I hope you too can find some comfort from reading others posts.
Message when you want, and know that you can say whatever you want.
No one judges, we are all here for each other.
Love and hugs to you, and everyone :heart::heart::hugs::hugs:

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@Niknik71 sorry for your loss. I too lost my husband to cancer in April this year. Everything is just so hard to navigate. All the practical & emotional stuff. I haven’t touched my husband’s clothes other than moving them to his wardrobe. I’m not ready yet. Sending hugs.

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@Cathphil @Jan17 thank you both for your kind words.
The crazy thing is putting his coats away was unintentional, I was putting my winter coats away & thought it was ok to do the same with his :cry:.
Everything else of Charlie’s remains the same, just like it’s waiting for him to come home :heart:

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I am the same. Finding it hard to change bed as Tom always did it. It’s 4 months since Tom died on the golf course. Thought I was doing ok but anxiety is taking me over especially palpitations.

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