Hi lovely people,
I’ve been on this forum a little bit over the last few weeks, but this is my first time posting.
A quick run through of my story. My partner’s wonderful mother passed away over Christmas and we’ve both been struggling to come to terms with it since. We were both there when she passed, which was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Although she wasn’t my mum, I loved her so much and she was a massive part of my life for the six years my boyfriend and I have been together.
Over the last week, my partner has deteriorated dramatically, and it’s safe to say the shock has worn off. He’s very down, drinking constantly, self harming and saying he is feeling suicidal. He also just wants to be alone, is off work and has told me that he doesn’t want to see me or me staying in our house.
I’m really struggling to know what to say or do and don’t feel I have anyone to turn to as he won’t want me telling any of our friends/family about how low he is. It’s really difficult to get the right balance and I want to give him the space he needs and respect his wishes (no matter how hard it is to hear you bf doesn’t want to see you) but also I’m genuinely worried for his safety and I’m not sure I should leave him on his own.
Do any of you have any advice? Did any of your love ones do anything that really helped you when you were finding it hard to cope with bereavement? Have you been through or experienced similar? I’m feeling very scared, young and out of my depth at the moment.
Thanks so much