It was our beautiful and brave sons funeral last Monday. A week on and the loss feels even greater. I feel so overwhelmed and lost and empty. He took his own life. It was so out of the blue. He experienced battles with his mental health but 2025 saw a real change and he genuinely had the best 8 months of his adult life, was talking about moving out and getting a job. Our world is shattered.
My beautiful girls funeral was on 20 October and I too felt so much worse for a while afterwards and when I say worse, I mean absolutely in the depths of despair, moreso than I’d felt since losing her. It has started to lift a little this week but I’ve gone back to feeling a bit numb, maybe in denial again I think, but still in tears several times a day. Still can’t believe this has happened, the funeral certainly didn’t bring me any closure or comfort even though it was a beautiful turn out and tribute to my beautiful girl xx
I believe it’s perfectly normal to feel worse after the funeral, maybe it’s the finality, maybe it’s having more time to think when there are no more arrangements to make or maybe it’s the realisation that this is it now. I hope you have support around you? Baby steps at the moment is all I can suggest, it’s an awful path to be on and nothing I can say will help you to feel better but please keep posting on here because it really can be a bit of a lifeline and there are some people much further along the path who have some really good words to share xx
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Thank you so much for your message, im sorry we share this group and our pain x
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