I lost my beautiful wife of 25 years 8 weeks ago, just short of her 55th birthday. I’m trying to hold it together, but its so hard. I can be trying to function, and then the grief, the overwhelming sense of loss and sadness hits me. I can’t believe she’s gone. I’ve no idea what the future holds and to be honest I don’t really care - I never envisaged being in this situation, and I’m just lost and empty. Does it get better?
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Im so sorry for your loss, i lost my beloved husband on 23rd November 2024 to cancer, he was only 50, we had just celebrated our 22 wedding anniversary on 19th October, my heart is broken and I struggle everyday to go on without him.
I can’t give you any answers but wanted to let you know that your not alone
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@Bill67
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my 56 year old amazing husband 7 weeks ago, so I’m also seeking advice all the time. I did listen to a great audio book yesterday about your brain and grief and it said that your brain is wired to look for someone who has been such a massive part of your life and when that beloved person dies it still looks for them and thus pulls us back to memories and yearning for them. These moments just hit you like a huge wave don’t they, often when you least expect it. As we continue to live our lives and as each day passes the brain adjusts and, although we still miss our loved ones with all our hearts, that terrible physical pain lessens and we remember them in a different way, a more bearable way, so I guess they are saying that time does heal the heart (and brain) a little. I imagine this isn’t the same for everyone as we are all very different but it gave me some hope and it does make sense to me. Do you have family and friends that can support you? I’m just taking one day at a time, take care of yourself and reach out on here whenever you need to, and remember, although it may feel it sometimes, you are not alone, we are here with you
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@Poppet1973 my condolences, I feel for you
@Poppet1973 I’m so sorry for your loss, what an awful path we find ourselves on. You are right though, there is always someone on here, we are not alone, which is a comfort, take care of yourself
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@AlliH my condolences. That book sounds interesting, can you share the title please? I’m struggling to make sense of everything, so anything that even gives a glimmer of understanding would be welcome.
I miss my Zo, I’ve lost her and I’ve also lost a big part of me. We don’t have any kids, so its the dogs who have been giving me some meaning and structure.
People tell me this is part of the “normal” grieving process…but nothing about this feels normal.
Take care.
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@Bill67 it’s called The Grieving Brain and I found it on audible. It certainly helped me understand a little more and a lot of it seems to make sense to me. I don’t know about you, but things go over and over in my head trying to rationalise and come to terms with all that’s happened over the last few months, not just when he passed but the months beforehand, the ‘what ifs’ that keeping going over in my brain and trying to think of anyways I could have done things differently in the hope of a different outcome, it’s all a bit illogical really but the book also explains that a bit, which has given me some comfort in this aspect. I find, with him going so young, I’m really grieving the future and all the lovely things we could have done together, it’s so difficult but it’s very early days at the moment, for you too. Dogs are great companions in our times of need and give us a bit of purpose and structure don’t they. Anytime you need support just reach out and hopefully the book helps too
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All these posts sound so familiar to me.
I’m 11 months in from losing my husband aged 56, after a short battle with cancer.
It’s still hurts like hell and I still grieve his loss every single day.
It maybe doesn’t get easier but it does get less difficult. And the yearning and desolation do subside over time.
So don’t give up - just keep going each day as best you can.
The love we all feel for our lost one will, I hope, eventually be our strength and resolve going into the future.
Xxx
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So sorry to hear of your loss sending prayers to you. I also know how you feel as i lost my beloved i January 26 2024 . I miss him terribly. Life not the same without my beloved 
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