It’s been a week today since I lost my mum. On the day she passed she was talking. She was feeling a little stronger but I found out today that she had had an argument with the nurses as she didnt want a wash. They then decided to forcibly take the oxygen away from my mum and forced her to have a wash just a few hours before she died. She could barely breath without the oxygen. After washing her she was weak due to lack of oxygen, she couldn’t fight back. They finally gave her the oxygen back only to come back in a few minutes later and tell my sister who was there that they wanted to reduce my mums oxygen “as the oxygen is the only thing keeping her alive” they were told no by all of her children me included. My mum was still with us, still awake, still moving etc but because of what they’d done that morning she got worse. A few hours later she died. The hospital treated her badly while she was there. Like a waste of time and resources as we all knew she was dying. They gave up on her. Put a dnr on her paperwork without any conversation or permission. I feel they killed my mum that day by removing her oxygen and leaving her barely able to breath
Hi @Claire52 ,
Thank you so much for sharing this with the community 
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I just wanted to let you know that you have been heard and you are not alone.
I also wanted to share with you this Sue Ryder article which you may find useful when you feel ready. Losing a parent: Losing a parent - Coping with the death of a parent | Sue Ryder
Take good care,
Alex
So sorry for the loss of your Mum i loss my Mum to cancer Oct 2019 and i feel the hospital did nothing for her she was not even given the choice to start chemo they just left her to die they said she was not strong enough to have any treatment but i knew my mum and she would have cope with anything that would of helped her i think it was her age that stopped them from doing anything as she was 79 and i feel they just gave up on her
Dear @Claire52
I feel your heartbreak for your dear mum. So, so sad and sorry to read your comment. This is agonising for you. It’s important to get things out by sharing on here.
I feel and understand exactly the anger re the hospital (I call them national hell sinister) … My own dad was killed off. My own comment thread on this forum is titled “hospital won’t let my dad home to die”. But it’s very upsetting to read.
I’m determined in the future to raise awareness of what actually happens on these hell hole wards.
This is just a rushed reply from me here, to show support and huge understanding of all that you’re going through.
(I’ve witnessed too many times ward bullies, club mentality, and not doing the right ethical thing by the patient. My life aim, now that I’ve lost both my precious parents, is to raise awareness of what is going on in hospitals. I believe it’s a ‘killing field’. A death pathway for frail or vulnerable or elderly. These people in uniforms and the doctors are complicit in ending people’s lives sooner than is natural or necessary. They can be heartless bullies. It’s criminal, but who dares complain about the NHS - they murdered my dad for sure. I’m tortured by the thought of his suffering every day).
My apologies if my response makes you or anyone reading more distressed. I don’t mean to do that. No pressure to reply.
Best wishes
Cordy 
I cried reading this post and subsequent comments. I feel horrendously let down by the hospital that my Dad died in, 7 months on and im struggling. As far as we can tell he died alone and had an awful final week 
my heart breaks for all these people that this is happening to. Our loved ones enter hospital thinking that they will be cared for and that is far from what is happening, in our situation the only people who showed any compassion are volunteers.
Sending love and hugs to all that are going through this x
Thank you for your words. Big thought your way, and to us all on here. I haven’t been on for ages, but am planning to try to raise awareness in the future of what too often happens. Somehow I’ve got to figure out how to do an (anonymous) podcast or YT channel to start the conversation about what goes on, and yes how the powers that be all too easily get away with it. Currently the hospital are stalling me by not investigating my complaint. Not that a complaint will bring my poor ole dad back, but I have to get some answers - but if course I won’t get any truth or apology but I’m not ever going to give up.
Big thoughts to everyone on here. I’m still going through daily grief and sheer upset.
This is just a very quick message to say I’ll update soon. I’ve not felt able to comment on here for a good while. I haven’t forgotten you. I will update very soon. Things remain difficult, and compounded by other things. Take care everyone for now x 