Its my mums two year anniversay of her passing, it happened on my husbands birthday, 22,09, 17. Its so difficult being happy for my husband and sad for my mum

Hi Theresa. It’s like a ‘tug-o-war’. One side of you wanting to please your husband and the other still grieving. The two emotions are bound to cause conflict, and conflict means pain.
I dislike anniversaries. When my wife was with me we rarely celebrated anything, but that’s a personal choice. I doubt very much that any feelings of love or compassion are lost by not celebrating.
You need more time. There is no set time for grief. The common remark, ‘you should be over this by now’ is just plain nonsense. No one would say that if they had been where you are; where we all are.
The process of grief for some can take a long time. Never be upset by that fact. Take it easy and look for that elusive light in the darkness. Take care.

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Thank u Jonathon. Its very true, it just takes time.