Being left out.

So as some of you know I am over two years in to this journey now. I’m coping, just about, but that’s mainly because I keep busy. However, Trevor and I didn’t have children together, but he has two grown sons. I am now starting to feel as though I am being left out of the loop, so to speak. The oldest has been great, calling regularly and helping me out if I need little jobs done that I can’t manage. But even he ‘forgot’ to mention that he is changing jobs. The youngest is a different story, he rarely contacts me, but I do have contact with his wife. And this morning I contacted them to confirm a quick visit only to be told they are at the airport waiting to go to Portugal. I always thought this might happen, but it is so sad when it does.


I agree, we become an afterthought as our family get on with their lives. It used to really anger me, but I now think that as long as they are healthy and happy then I let them get on with it. I had 50 wonderful years with my Peter and I know things are different now than they were in the ‘old’ days when we looked after our parents, but times have changed so much, not in a good way either, but we have to live with it.

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It is extremely sad that these days people just move on with their lives and think the ones left behind are okay. As already said things were so different back in the days when we were young. Everyone looked out for each other and not just family but friends and neighbours. It’s a different world in which we live now and have no choice other than to manage best we can. Thankfully there’s always this forum to turn to when needed.
Take care …Jen

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Dear Jen,

Thank you, you also take care.


look at it this way: I have a friend and she is the grandmother of the family.
they often exclude her, too.

my cousins are hardly in touch. siblings fall out.

just to say try not to take it too personally as even relatives have trouble with their relations. in the end we all must care for ourselves. sort of the onus of each human being.

even divorced people are devastated by betrayal … be kind to yourself.

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