Being made to feel like you should be over it

Is anyone else being made to feel like you should be over grief quicker than you are . People keep saying things like " are you ok " when you can’t concentrate or " you’re being eratic and having mood swings" because you’re trying to put on brave face but crying the next minute or being told you’re negative and down.
I lost my dog a week ago and it was after a long line of a lot of horrible things happening in my life such as parents both having cancer and my daughter leaving home and having no contact. My boy Stanley ( my dog) never left my side through it all and gave me all the love everyday to get through it all and then he died suddenly.
Now people such as my husband think I should be ok and I’m not handling it the way they think I should . I’m trying but feel pressured I to feeling OK when I don’t just so it makes everyone else’s lives easier .

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Hi Stanley. Yes I have been made to feel I should be over grief by now. I lost my husband Peter April 2020 and all my family expect me to be over it by now. As you know to add to my grief I lost my beloved dogs Merlin and Star a few months ago. To my family they were just dogs and I should certainly be over their deaths by now but they were family to me and I can’t talk to anyone about them because they don’t understand so I can relate to your feelings. If you need to talk I am often on here. Jenny. X


No a lot of people don’t understand which is another problem as it epuld be easier to talk to anyone and heal faster but they juat think you’re being sad , down , negative and then it bothers them to be around it so you ate constantly pushing yourself daily which only leads to crashing in feelings when anything trigger them off like memories etc .
I am sorry for your pain and losses, its a harder time for everyone at Christmas and with covid it has put that extra strain on people . At keast we have found places like this to speak to others with similar feelings so we can feel half normal.
You take as long as you need and do what is toght for you each day , look at photos, remember a song whatever works for you . Speak to me or soneone on here when you are having a bad day or good actually and time will slowly heal to feel like it’s more bearable but there is no time limit on it .
Thank you for your message x

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Hiya Stanley lost my husband to cancer 13months ago grieve is terrible lv annie x

Hello Annie, so sorry to hear anout your husband . Both my parents had cancer , breast and prostate and I know its a terrible time for everyone . This group is lovely and comforting and you can chat to anyone anytime x

It is Stanley you can vent any time with people who understand what your feeling lv annie

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All the people closest to me have been great for the first week and then it’s " maybe you should talk to someone " because I can get randomly upset which I think it a normal part of grieving. Some just think it’s been long enough now you shpuld be fine which as we know there is no time limit . I am finding comfort in his photos and happy memories but of course that doesn’t stop the missing him and wanting him here with me x