I left home on the morning of 18th February, saying goodbye to my husband, my world my everything. He text me at 3pm to say his 3.30 telephone coaching appointment has been cancelled. The message as always had hearts and kisses. I arrived home at 4.30 to find him collapsed on the kitchen floor, I tried to resuscitate until the ambulance came. He was gone, no illness, no warning, we walked a lot! I am really struggling at the moment, the shock, the loneliness, the horrible pain!
Jacqui I am so sorry you have lost your lovely Husband. The shock must have been terrible for you, we think we are going to have many years together then suddenly it all gets snatched away in the worst way possible. This isolation doesn’t help when you are missing your other half, it just gives you more time to think about things. It is good you have found this forum the people are amazing and we all understand as we have been exactly where you are. It is still very raw for you, been 19 weeks for me since my husband passed, like you there was no warning just an unexpected heart attack and my world changed forever. It is horrendous and every day is a struggle do you have any family and friends who can support you? I know you can’t believe it at the moment but it does get easier, take it a day at a time and do what you have to do to get through. You will get help and understanding on here so keep posting
Sending you positive thoughts
Oh my goodness Jacqui. Whatever I say at this moment wont even begin to ease your pain, time will a little. It’s far too soon to be expecting any real relief. Shock, loneliness and pain are the lot of most of us here at the moment. This site is with lovely caring people and no doubt you will have more replies.
Take it easy, well as easy as you can. Day by day even hour by hour. Let the emotions come, and when you feel down anytime come back and talk to us. The empathy and understanding is all here because we have all been where you are now. Circumstances may be different, but grief is the same wherever it happens.
Take care and be kind to yourself. Blessings. John
I am so so sorry for your loss, this community is amazing everybody is so supportive I only joined yesterday myself and the beautiful supportive messages I’ve had have been so comforting. When I couldn’t sleep last night I was able to come on and chat please remember your never alone I think I’ve found lots of new friends ( I hope so has ) god bless beautiful lady xxxxx
Hi Alex, I see you have just joined as well as you have lost your partner. It is awful isn’t it & made so much worse by what is going on in the world today. I am glad you have found support on here (we do try) as it seems your partners family have robbed you of even saying goodbye to him which is beyond comprehension you must feel so lost and alone. This forum has been my saviour chatting to others who know exactly how I feel having been through it themselves. My family and friends have been amazing but have not experienced what I am going through its hard for them to understand. Keep posting, there is always someone around to listen to you.
Thank you so so much for your beautiful message it’s so so heartbreaking at the moment xxx
Thank you. I do have family and friends nearby but now we are all in lockdown which does not help. We were gifted a beautiful Grandson less than 2 weeks before I lost Keith, the cuddles really helped the awful pain. Thank you for reaching out to me. Jacqui x
Thank you Jonathan.
Bless you, I am hoping that this helps. I am so pleased it has helped you. Xx
That is so sad Jacqui, I bet Keith would have been a fabulous Grandad too life is so bloody cruel isn’t it. I keep thinking about people who have just lost someone & need their family & friends around them but due to the lockdown are being denied this. I know the first week after I lost Colin my home was filled with people all offering comfort & support and to think of you not having the same breaks my heart You get to the stage you think what else can happen just to make things even worse!
It is such early days for you Alex, we will never get over this but we will get through it somehow. In the early days I just wanted to be with Colin but I have a wee yorkie & it was her that made me get out of bed in the morning or I wouldn’t have bothered. I had lost my Mum three weeks before Colin so a double whammy but I am still here & battling on and you will as well even if at this present moment feeling better is beyond comprehension.
OMG how sad and heartbreaking for you your such a strong lady, I had a little tea cup Yorkie god I miss her so so much but she passed she was very old but having a pet that relies on you is the best tonic as you say they give you a reason to get up in the morning and keep you focused. I lost my son 3 years ago aswell so still grieving for him. He was 25 xxxx
Oh Alex how awful for you to have lost your son and now your partner. I always say it is the circle of life for us to lose our parents but not our children. I don’t think you can ever get over something like that. I don’t have any kids but I can imagine the pain, you are the strong one having gone through that. You start to feel you are being punished don’t you ( or is that just me) I keep saying I must have done something really bad to have this heaped on me
Daisy is a wee teacup also & a little Diva, she adored her Daddy & it is just these last few weeks she has stopped looking for him xx
Mrs colt it is so hard when you lose your child I just threw myself into work had something to focus on as my job is very demanding challenging and utter chaos. My late partner helped me through it so this time I’m going it alone. xxxx
I am heart broken for you Alex, it is going to be so hard for you without your partner. There is nothing I can say that will make you feel any better and if I could take your hurt away I would x
Aw thank you I know I can ride this storm but just now I can’t see a way out of this, it’s broke my it really has. There are people worse off than me I know that but it still kills me xxxx
That’s what I found being on here Alex, you think you are going through the worst thing ever then you chat to someone who has been through so much worse and it makes you count your blessings.
Dear Jacqui -I lost my lovely husband in the same way. I had the usual lunchtime call with him and tried to call him when I left work. No answer but I just thought he had left his phone at home - my daughter found him when I was driving home. Called the ambulance but we were about two hours too late. God it hurts and I could just hear him say ‘I am sorry love’ .
It has been nearly 11 months and the pain is different - it is easier in a way but I miss him so so much. I felt guilt that I was not there - but I know there is nothing I could have done, I felt guilt as our conversation at lunchtime had been rushed. But I know he loved me as I loved him. This site told me to take baby steps - don’t think about the future - just get through the day a little at a time. Take care xxx
So sorry for your loss my partner passed away last November with no warning why I was at work no warning turned out it was lung cancer I still can’t believe i t has happened thoughts with you and your family
We will be with you Alex xxx I already feel less lonely from this beautiful community. Xx