Cant cope with death

My other half died through poorly controlled diabetes 10 weeks ago neither of us took his condition seriously. I’m 6 months pregnant and we have a 1 year old too I feel lost. I’m having so many days where I want to join him. Reality will always kick in before thoughts turn to actions and thinking of my 4 children and how much they need me makes me get out of bed in the mornings I had 10 years with a nasty git, then find him just over 2 & half years ago and I feel cheated he had just turned 40 and it’s so unfair

Hi Addy, it sounds awful, I’m so sorry. Grief is hard, but I hope your children can help to carry you through. If you ever feel unsafe, please ring the samaritans or NHS 111. Also, have you considered going to your GP and asking for some support?xxx

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Hi Addy76,

Welcome to the Sue Ryder Online Community. I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve lost your other half while you are pregnant. It must be incredibly tough to deal with your grief while looking after four children and preparing for the new baby.

I’m glad that you’ve found this site, as this is a place you can share your feelings openly and honestly. There are many others here who have lost a partner.

For example, you may wish to read and reply to this conversation, where you can find L71, Kay, Colin and JayMB, who have all lost their partners in their 40s:

We also had this conversation a little while ago, started by a user called Heartbroken and Pregnant, who lost her partner while pregnant: In the replies, you can also find Deone, who lost her partner very shortly after their son was born. Neither of them has been on the site for a few months, but if you do post a reply, they should get an email notification.

Have you been offered any sort of bereavement support or counselling? Cruse Bereavement offers a helpline, email support, and counselling and support groups through their local services: 0808 808 1677​,, You can also contact your GP and ask to be referred to counselling.

The charity Gingerbread supports single parents (including those who have been bereaved). It offers online forums and offline support groups:

If there’s anything I can help with, or you have any questions about using the site, just let me know.

Online Community Manager

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Dear Priscilla/Lost I have made contact with gp and result was sleeping tablets but I’m trying not to use them most of what I read online says not wise while pregnant thanks for your replies Addy x

Oh dear, sorry to hear that the GP was not very helpful. If you think you would benefit from speaking so someone one-to-one, I’d suggest getting in touch with Cruse - a lot of people on this site have found them very helpful.

Hi Addy,

Are there any other GPs in your practice? I find some are more sympathetic than others. Definitely ask them about the meds/pregnany risk because that sounds scary.

All the best

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