I lost my mum on the 19th December, im really struggling atm as im having a bit of health complications that i feel are related to intense bereavement emotions, I miss her soo much as i feel i am to blame, it was a struggle to get her to see a gp as she didn’t like the experience soo would try to avoid them, i’d go down for her but because of patient confidentiality i couldn’t do much, i just wish i said the right word, the right phrase, a few days before she died she said to me on the phone she was going to get a gp appointment in the morning, later that night we had to get an ambulance 
i don’t know what to do, i’ve been many times to the gp myself to the point i think they’re annoyed with me, even to the point where the head gp said “We have 3000 patients tied to this practice, we dont have the facilities to support you” I just feel truely alone in my battle, where before if i felt like this(i have depression and anxiety) it would be my mum who’d be there for me, now im struggling to do it myself, and most days i am just soo tired i dont have the will to do anything constructive, i miss her and feel soo hopeless, does anyone have any tips?
Hi Lewis, I’m so sorry to hear that you have lost your mum and you are struggling with depression and anxiety. It sounds as though you could really benefit from some support and it’s sad to hear that your GP has said they are unable to help you. We have an online bereavement counselling service available to members of this community - it’s free and takes place over video chat. If you think you might find this helpful, you would need to fill in some more details and book an assessment. Find out more: https://support.sueryder.org/bereavement-counselling
Writing things down here on the community is also a really good way to get things off your chest and get support from others who understand. While you wait for more replies to your post, you might also find it helpful to read and reply to some of the other recent posts in the Losing a Parent section of the site to find others with similar experiences: https://support.sueryder.org/community/losing-parent