how do you cope this week I got a knock on my door by police to say that they had to force entry into my brothers house and said he had sadly past away
It will be 4 years in May since I lost my wife then three months later my mother all these deaths were natural causes but so sudden
I honestly don’t know if I can go on it is absolutely crippling me he was in the army in his younger life so its only since my wife and mother passed away that we got a lot closer I spent most of my time there helping to renovate his house from a dump to a beautiful home and he hasn’t had time to cherish it why is life so cruel
I honestly don’t think I can carry on
If anybody can share there ways of coping I would love to hear


Ah @chaz - this is really, really tough for you. I think acknowledging how hard it is is important. Give yourself some time to process it all. I would recommend getting some counselling from a bereavement expert. I have had some and it has helped me. They offer it through Sue Ryder so you could maybe look that up. The way I cope (I am a widow, lost my husband this past January) is to keep talking to him, telling him what I am up to and how I miss him. I make myself go out and meet up with friends - taking all invitations that come my way. I make myself cook - even when I really don’t want. I find a structure to the day helps, too. My friend, take your time, you are dealing with a lot there. Be kind to yourself.

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Thank you for your kind words of support

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Dear Chaz

I cannot imagine how low you must feel and wanted to give you the contact number of an organisation called Shout. You can text Shout85258 and receive a prompt response. This may be just what you need right now so do look at their website too.

It’s perfectly understandable you are at your lowest after all your losses, so do something for you and I hope you find the comfort and kindness you need. We are all here for you.

Take care please.


Oh Chaz I’m so very sorry to read this news. You must be heartbroken after the death of your brother on top of everything else you have had to deal with.
I do hope you’re ok.
Be gentle on yourself, it’s hard to cope at times. Look at Sue Ryder counselling, or try “Cruse” or other bereavement sites.
You can carry on, you can. You are honestly stronger than you think.
Please let us know you are ok

Thank you Janey it has took me over just 3yrs to get over the loss of my lovely wife then my mother me and my brother only got really close over the last 4 yrs I will battle on in there memory but I know it will be hard thank you for your kind words I will look into getting support take care it helps me to talk even if it’s just texting I love to talk about them and share the love I hold in my heart for them x

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Thank you so much

Dear Chaz

It’s good to see you have had some kind and loving words come your way from Vancouver and Janey. I’m sure others will see the posts and join in.

If you want to talk about your family here you are very welcome, that is what we are here for - to be there when you don’t know where to turn and need to speak of your precious memories.

Take care,