Christmas...

Losing a partner
1

Just had my recent local MS Societies newsletter drop through my letterbox, plus the Hotel Christmas menu, a large rather posh hotel not far from our MS venue where myself and Richard have-had attended these last 2 or 3 years, where we had both enjoyed ourselves and the splendid meal…Well seeing this menu drop out with the leaflet started me off crying as if I was to menage to get myself there this year, and to think we are only 6 away from when we have our Christmas lunch at this hotel, and they are looking for us to start booking as from now to guarantee our seating as this venue, the dining room that is allocated to our group always gets packed out…I started crying as if I was to go, this will be the first I will be going without Richard, and two, I dont even know if I will be able to ge myself there, maybe a taxi, but a two way taxi is going to cost me a bomb am sure, besides one cant always judge when it will be over, when to get the taxi to come pick me up, you can tell I am not used to taking nor booking taxis, this will be a whole new ball game, so to speak…
Oh this local MS Society do run a pick up and collect but I fear I am too far out and would not qualify, maybe I am worrying over nothing as the next monthly meeting that is due soon, there is a committee member coming to collect me and bring me home, then she-they will be arranging transport so as I can continue getting in on the monthly basis, which maybe them booking taxi at my expense…So many things I took my Richard for granted and he willing done them, never argued, complained and never said a no…

Jackie…

2

To be honest, I cant see myself there enjoying myself without Richard sitting at my side…There would be maybe 8 sitting around each circled table…

3

My daughter has also mentioned Christmas, as all my family always came to our house for Christmas Dinner, not this year though too painful. My husband loved that my Daughter and my two sons their partners and grandchildren all came, I always cooked always went overboard. I did moan to my husband it was all getting too much, he replied but you always do it, sadly he won’t be here to celebrate. My daughter is taking control I don’t mind at all, not thinking that far ahead. She suggests going out or she will cook if we all don’t mind prepared supermarket food, bless her.

4

I remember back to the Christmas we had after my Dad had died. We always got together for Christmas dinner at one of my brothers houses. The whole family. That year we did it at a different house (ours). The empty seat wasn’t as obvious at a different house. But do you know what, all the changes we make to try to help the situation never really make the pain of missing someone go away. Maybe they mask it I suppose. I have to say I laughed that Christmas Day when I thought of my Dad, simply because all his efforts at Christmas were definitely efforts. Efforts he made for my mum and the rest of us, particularly as he got older. He found Christmas and all that went with it an inconvenience I’m sure. He made me laugh. So that year I was happy for him that he’d managed to avoid it :slight_smile: When we were without our mum a few years later that was a different story. My mum loved Christmas. As for this year and Christmas without my husband, I’m focusing more on how I’ll get through June if I’m honest. Can I miss the amazing man of mine anymore at Christmas, I very much doubt it xxx