Coming upto 7 months

April 1 will be 7 months since I lost my Rob.
He is constantly on my mind and I have no objection to that.
I have had counciling due to experiencing very dark days when I wanted to end it all , I have got through that and no longer have these dark thoughts.
I have made some slight adjustments to my routines to get around the things Rob and I did together.
My two kids are grown. Up and have homes and lives of their own and today my daughter asked “ are you getting used to being on your own now mum” I know she has had major concerns around me being on my own so l tell a fib and say yes I’m getting there and make light of it.
I suppose 7 months is still fairly early days and I am getting better than I was so I ask myself “ am I getting there “ .
This pain will never go away it might ease but it won’t go altogether .
The tears are more manageable now.

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Like you I’m at seven months by the end of March. I have mentioned this in another post recently, but Karen is still in my every waking thought. I can work, cook and clean and otherwise function in a “normal” manner, but no one knows what thoughts are in my head.
I might cry less, but I miss Karen as much now as I did seven months ago. I assume this is how my life will continue, outwardly looking normal, inwardly forever missing the girl I met and fell in love with in 1981.
Rereading your post, I think there are striking similarities on our assessment of where we are


Dear Karen and Richard

Seven months mid-April. Its like a game of snakes and ladders - I take so many steps forward only to fall and be back to the start position. The pain is still as intense, the dark thoughts are always there and I cry daily.

I met my husband in 1978 and married in 1982. Not enough decades left in my lifetime to recover from his loss.