Hi. I lost my husband last July. He had metastatic kidney cancer and died within 6 weeks of diagnosis. I have struggled to cope from day to day, even hour to hour. However, I belong to a golf club and my friends there have been a fantastic support. Children and grandchildren have been great too, but they are bereaved as well, so they can’t make me feel any better. 3 weeks ago I had the sudden whim that nobody else could help me but me, so I booked to visit second cousins in Australia, and within a week I flew out. Still here! It has been the best thing I could have done, as I’m removed temporarily from all the reminders of a wonderful 50 year marriage. I know this isn’t an option open to many, and I’m so lucky to have family so far away. When I return next week I have no idea how I will feel being back, but for a brief period of time life feels worth living again. Didn’t expect to ever feel like that again. Just wanted to share this with those of you still struggling, as I have been xx
That’s absolutely brilliant! Total respect to you. In a much smaller way it’s something we could all try to do; giving ourselves a little bit of respite from the stress. I have made a concerted effort to do things that I didn’t do with Alan. Some of the new people I spend time with don’t even know my situation which means they have no expectations and I can just be me rather than ‘the widow’. I have bought some new stuff for the house and new clothes so that I don’t have the ‘last time I wore this….’scenario. Yesterday I was driving by the dunes and the sun was shining on the sea. I stopped for a bit and, in that moment, concentrating on the beauty of nature I was happy. Grief is so utterly exhausting and consuming and I think if we can allow ourselves a break it can only be a good thing. I hope everyone can find a little bit of peace today x
Thats so lovely. I got some family in Perth, australia. I love australia … much better than here tbh … enjoy you time there … when i went at aged 21 to see my grandad who had gone on the £10 pomme scheme in the 60 's , i didnt want to come back here ! X