I try to come off as coping well with what’s has happened and a little indifferent about the whole situation to everyone I know and work with. I convince myself that it’s done and over and there is nothing to be upset about almost like it happened to someone other than me.
It’s when I am not trying to distract myself that hurts, those moments where just one thought sea me off and I justness sit there and cry.
I know that I am finding it hard to motivate myself to do anything, it’s affecting my work and I acknowledge it’s wrong but there are mornings where I wake up and I can’t face people, or the situation where I have to pretend everything is fine.
People have said “I’m here if you ever want to talk” but I know it’s social obligation and they don’t really want to be put in that situation. I don’t have many friends, and fewer stil that I feel I can openly talk to about how I feel without being told what you expect to hear.
I’m just in a state of limbo I guess… I don’t know…