Coping with the loss of my mum

My mum passed away last Friday. She has been suffering with Alzheimer’s for a long time but her final decline was very painful to see. My 88 year old father visited her every day for the 3 years she was in a care home. Prior to that he was her main carer in the family home until his stroke 3 years ago. He is utterly heart broken which is hardly surprising after nearly 62 years of devoted married life. I was surprised by my own grief also. I am permanently exhausted and only just coping with making all the necessary arrangements. I am also conflicted by my responsibility as a Y6 teacher. My class should have me there right now helping them prepare their Leaving service - but I just can’t be either emotionally nor logistically. How are others coping with their grief and other commitments?

Dear Sally66,

You are not the only one who is finding it really hard to cope. I don’t have a high powered career or family to worry about, but I am still finding it really hard to deal with the everyday things that need to be done after a death. My Mum passed away on June 11th this year. I think this is normal, you have only just lost your Mum and you can’t be expected to be on top form. You have got to give yourself time to come to terms with your loss. Try to be kind to yourself and give yourself time to adjust.

I wish you all the best, take care,


Hi Sally,

I’m so sorry for your loss. My hear goes out to you and ur family.

I lost my Mum 3years ago and there r still many days where I don’t want to cook or do chores or feed my family I just want to sit down alone and grieve for my Mum.

But we live such busy lives that’s just not practical.

I wouldn’t be so hard on urself. Don’t worry about ur school leavers I’m sure they will

Big hugs to u X xxxx