I find myself here again i dont know which way to turn, everyday life is just passing me by, but every single thought is of my dad, who i lost in may, we nursed him at home, the cancer literally tore his body apart, his bones broke ebery time he moved, and i cant shake the visions i have?? I have no memories of before this…yet there were soo many good ones?? The pain of missing him is constant, i feel alone even though im surrounded by love, i thought i was doing ok, but these last few days have been awful
I lost my dad the same way 2 days ago.will take a long time get past the horror ive seen this week…but theres arrangements to make so need to find the strength…my heart goes out to you too x
Hi, your loss is still relatively recent so you need to take time to process what’s happened. Rather than agonising over the horrific details that torment you, could you not look through photos to remember happier memories? I would also suggest trying to use some distraction activities so that your mind is busy with other thoughts. Are you in a daily routine of some kind so that you’re keeping busy? I’m not saying it’s easy, I’ve suffered the same agonising thoughts, but when it’s affecting you so badly it’s time to try and help yourself. Have you considered getting counselling? Best wishes xx
@Andytee im so sorry you’re going through this pain too, thats the thing, we had so much to sort, but thats all done now? Its all so final some how we do get the strengths to carry on, thinking of you!
@Rosiepink im trying so hard, and have been ok ish up to this past week, im on 2 weeks anual leave from work, work has kept me busy and motivated, im taking time out but thats what seems to be triggering me, as for the good memories, like i said they have faded away for now, i dont want to remember the last days of his life, but its imprinted in my head as was soo horrfic, im going through normal daily routines school runs, house work, work and am ok,but when the grief hits its taking all my strength away…thankyou for taking time to reach out x
I feel your pain, i really do . I lost my dad in december and I’m like you. Cant get the last few weeks out of my mind. Keep replaying it over and over. I try to think of happy times but the sad times take over. I hope one day that happy times take over the bad ones. All i can say is take it one day at a time. Xx
@Willow2018 thats exactly how i feel, i can be busy at work, having a relatively normal day, them bam out of no where im re living the last days, the screams of pain, the frustration, dad being so scared, i cant seem to shake it…i wake up early in the mornings and cant go back to sleep as i just keep laying there awake, my mind goes crazy!! Thankyou for reaching out, im always here to listen if you need it also
Funny thing is my dad didnt do much just watch tv and play with his mobile but he was always there in his chair at the house and now hes not…very strange feeling…like a void…must be very strange for my mum who was with him 24/7
Hi Dawn. I honestly know how you feel. The hurt you feel is unreal. Ive never experienced pain like this before. Keep talking and look at photos of your dad. He wouldn’t want you to feel like this. Youre not alone xx
exactly the same my dad was in his chair on his phone and watching tv - football games are hard as hes not shouting at the tv no more lost my dad in june dont know how to feel normal anymore even in worl i feel its getting more difficult to keep going
To be honest i dont think we’ll ever feel the same. Gradually i suppose we’ll learn to cope with the new normal. Feels like that is a long way away. Youre not alone. Keep talking x
This is so so sad, it’s the first post I’ve read, I lost my dad 6 weeks ago to Glioblastoma, a brain cancer that has no success rate. We got him home to care for him until he passed away aswell and the only comfort I have at the moment is ‘at least he didn’t die in hospital’.
One thing I want to tell you is what one of the at home carers said to me and my mum ‘what your doing is amazing, having him home and caring for him in his environment is amazing and what’s best for him. Most families leave it all behind after a terminal diagnoses and pop in to see them occasionally, but you are in the thick of it doing what’s best for him and that, I credit you for’ and she said she’d tell anybody that would listen about us as a family because it’s so rare that people do what we did and I know I don’t know you or your situation but I hope you can take comfort from that as you seemed to have been in a similar situation to me. 🩷 our dads would be proud x
Im so so sorry to hear about your dad . Your situation sounds exactly the same as mine. My dad hsd the sane condition. We brought him home to care for him , and when the day came we were all with him. He lasted 7 weeks at home but im glad we could be with him. It was December when i lost my dad and now im finding im replsying everything thst happened. This site has really helped me ,talking to other people who are going through the same. Thank you to each and every one of you x
We got 4 weeks with mine. I said from the start, not so long ago, that processing it weeks or months later will be most difficult because it all happened so quickly. It’s crazy, my dad went to bed completely ‘normal’ and must have suffered the seizure in his sleep and went downhill from there, we had no idea what Glioblastoma was until he was diagnosed and we were given such limited time. Such a sick cruel world we live in
i dont know which way to turn, everyday life is just passing me by, but every single thought is of my dad, who i lost in may, we nursed him at home, the cancer literally tore his body apart, his bones broke ebery time he moved, and i cant shake the visions i have?? I have no memories of before this…yet there were soo many good ones?? The pain of missing him is constant, i feel alone even though im surrounded by love, i thought i was doing ok, but these last few days have been awful 
lost my dad in june dont know how to feel normal anymore even in worl i feel its getting more difficult to keep going
🩷 our dads would be proud x