Dealing with guilt.

I have just been reading some of your messages. My problem seems so different. I was never ready for anything in life because of a difficult time as a child. My whole life is a bereavement. I didn’t know how to love my husband or my children. My husband died five years ago. He was always there for me. Strangely I have grown up now in my seventies but it is all too late. I talk to him and tell him how sorry I am but I am also angry. I went through life not really living. I can’t bear to see mothers with babies. I want my babies back. I want to be the wife and mother I could be now but it has all gone. Somebody stole my life. When I read the letters from grief stricken people I think how lucky they were to have loved each other so much and I am so envious and feel such guilt. I hope my letter will bring some consolation to some of your readers. To know that would bring me a little bit of happiness.

Hi Pattoa, I’m sure your post has made a lot of people feel better about themselves, you are certainly not alone in how you feel, hindsight is a wonderful thing, but unfortunately we can’t go back, only forward, I think you are being very hard on yourself, you need to start being kind to yourself, take a day at a time, sending love Jude xx