For anyone who might’ve seen my post a few weeks ago you’ll know that I lost my mum in feb. I’ve since moved into a house I detest and the floodgates have opened.
Trouble is, I wouldn’t say I’m crying all the time about my mum. I’m always sad to not have her with me but the anxiety feelings are about having to stick it out in a house that isn’t home, but the tears are about- we’ll i don’t know. If I was sobbing with my mum at the forefront of my mind I’d understand more why I feel low.
I know it will all be interlinked but the problem I have now is that while propranolol is helping with the adrenaline rush that’s stopping me eating, how do I control the tears and lift the low mood. I’m doing everything I should like getting up and sorting the kids out but I’m forcing myself to clean, do chores, go shopping. All things that I have under control usually and enjoy doing. So I know I’m not clinically depressed but maybe mildly? Or just sad?
On Monday I saw the dr for an update and he agreed with me that I looked and seemed so much better since the last visit and he also agreed that I didn’t appear to be depressed just grieving. I did tell him I wasn’t my usual self though.
That evening I began to cry and I have t stopped since really. But I don’t know what I’m crying about! I want to move house desperately and I’m sure if we had a magic wand to move immediately I’d feel much better. My partner has said we can move once the six months is up and yet I’m still teary. But not necessarily with my lovely mum in mind. So I’m confused and wondering whether to go back to the dr to get something.
Thanks in advance everyone xx