Hi, I’m new here so sorry if I waffle on , I lost my partner of 26 years in February he was diagnosed with lung cancer in November but we were told we had time and treatments would be available, however we did not have time and he passed in February with barely anytime for treatment . I do get out of bed and attempt to do things but sometimes I don’t even want to get out of bed and face the day and If I make it out of bed sometimes the most I can do is walk the dog and occasionally hoover I was my partners main carer as he had copd before he was diagnosed with cancer I have a wonderful family who do invite my out but I don’t want to keep bringing them down I know they are struggling with their grief to
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Hi Viv,
It’s all a bit bewildering isn’t it?
Having lost my wife after being married for 26 years I can so empathise with you.
Everything is a chore or pointless.
I do believe there will come a time when we are able to find joy in things, I have to believe that.
I am trying to banish the negative thoughts with positive ones, being grateful for small things.
I’m rubbish at offering advice at the moment but I wish you loads of love and hope you get peace.
Joe x
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I am 14 months on. I too felt like you. Everything pointless. I felt detached and unconnected with people and didn’t care. I would walk the dog and drag on any clothes at hand. I would like like a tramp wandering the park. I would cry and didn’t care who saw me. I didn’t believe I would feel any different. Time puts space between you and that horrible day but it doesn’t change the way you feel. I still love my H. Because he isn’t does not make me love him any less. My love doesn’t just stop and I don’t think family and friends see that. I cope day to day but at any time I could be back on that day if I let myself think too much. I have bad days and better days. I cry when I need to and I talk to H all the time. It makes me feel close to him. I curl up in bed every night and talk about the day. I silently take my grief with me. It never leaves me I have learned to carry it. X
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