Don't lose hope.

I haven’t written on this site for a few months, but last time I did I was suicidal after the sudden death of my soulmate. I still long to be with her, but, life isn’t such an ordeal. I went to Cruse, they were great. Then went to see my G.P. He put me on anti depressants and referred me to a Mental Health nurse. I haven’t looked back. I join in family events instead of hiding away. I keep myself busy, and I’ve adopted a rescue dog that I must take out twice a day. I can now talk about my partner without fighting back the tears. Losing the most important thing in my life has somehow made me mellow. In the grand scheme of things nothing else matters. I’ve accepted my loss, and in doing so, feel she is with me always. I pray you all find peace.


Thanks so much for sharing this update - it’s really nice to hear that you have had some good support and are doing a bit better now. I think that there will be some people reading this who will really appreciate hearing a hopeful update like this.

It’s lovely to hear that you’ve adopted a rescue dog - pets can bring a lot of joy and meaning to our lives, and many people on this site have found them a lifeline in their grief.

Thank you so much for this, finding acceptance of what has happened is very hard but like you I found when I reached that point I knew I was getting better.

A rescue dog and couple of cats are in my plans too. Will probably be next year now that I get them. Cannot wait.

Thanks for sharing really good to hear your doing well … I’m also looking for a pup put some noise back into my house and give me a reason to get up and out on my Duvet wobbles days as I call them …

My story is very similar to yours and I am just about coping day to day now. Desparately need a dog and cats but am also selling our house so will wait till I have moved. I need something else in the house, something to keep me going.
I have also found that nothing else matters now. Things I used to get anxious about no longer seem important,the worst has happened.

Hi I just wanted to say I.m so glad I read your post. Mentioning your “duvet wobbles days” has helped me so much. It has articulated what happens to me,. and by naming it, you have helped me see these.days that I wake up and feel I can’t go on another day, for what they are. Just wobbles!! Having a name to call them has taken the fear and guilt out of them and reduced them to what they re. Just wobbles. we know, when you wobble on a bike, you just do things to counteract them and you’re soon back on track. :slight_smile: Best wishes with your pup search

Thank you for replying … nice to know it helped when I 1st lost my fiance 8 months ago I didn’t want to go to bed …to big to empty for 2 months … when I did finally and as I was off work i didn’t just wobble I feel off that bike and crashed only moving from bed to sofa with a blanket spent days like this but over time …it was like I heard him say get up get living don’t waste it … I got out of bed one day and wrote in lipstick on his wardrobe mirror … don’t dwell on things you can’t change get living the life we were supposed to have … love you always Stu xx. Some day it works somedays when I really have bad duvet/ sofa wobbles I give in to it ( and I think this is ok ) I think if I don’t my emotions just build up and up with enormaty and shock of it all thats happened I believe I would really crash so I’ve learnt this is another coping mechanism…I work nights some days I stay in bed from 7 till 8pm in evening until I get up and go to work but it passes and I like your bike analagy you may wobble but you have to get back on track and your so right … As for Puppy/s 1st week in Jan will need some major distraction my Partner proposed to me 00.10 …1/1/16 in hotel room overlooking london eye little did we know he had ticking time bomb in his head and that 6 weeks later he would diagnoised with a An aggressive brain tumour and just 32 day later after diagnoses he would pass away and I miss him every minute of every day … but life continues … best wishes always here if you need to vent or chat xx

Where |I live were not allowed to have any animals but am considering moving mainly just so I can get a dog for company also. I went away for four days just come back but kept crying as I had so many memories of going to places and he wasn’t there-its very very hard. I dont have family for support which is a big shame