The struggle is endless isn’t it. I am trying to keep my administrative plates spinning’ in this new year to honour my Beloved husband’s business affairs and have some semblence of normality but worry the mask will fall’ at some point and others will think, there you are, she’s not coping…’
Today I went for my recent ritual of a flat white at a local coffee lounge and remembered my love opening the door for me always to enter first when we went there together, forever the gent. I stood momentarily waiting to pay and thought if he came in now could I remember everything about him and I felt worried’ for want of a word that the moments and minutes and hours and days are rendering us further apart in my memory. Is this part of grief…
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Hi, it’s normal to feel like this, because it worried me I made a photo album of a lot if memorable times, then next to each photo I wrote detailed descriptions of what was happening in the photo, of course we remember the event but I was worried about remembering the finer details.
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Thank you Flower_Garden. I think it is the anxiety dimension of grief, wanting to keep everything clear and in real time", protecting and securing, part of the treasuring process