My ex partner of ten years died very suddenly three weeks ago…
we were extremely close and we were heading down the road of getting back together…
I received a call from his family that I needed to get to the hospital after Chris collapsed but he died twenty minutes after I got there so at least I was holding him when he passed away…
I was the last person to spend time with him in the chapel of rest before his coffin was sealed.
I am completely and utterly devastated.
His family have been very supportive and I’m doing my best to give them as much comfort as I can…
I will be meeting them at the cremation as I’m not immediate family so I won’t be part of the funeral car.
I’m very worried about knowing where I fit in and don’t overstep any boundaries when at the funeral…
I’m also concerned that the woman he saw briefly is going to show up playing the victim. His family hate her and don’t want her anywhere near any of us but as it’s a public funeral no one can stop her…
She’s a boozer and has sent me abusive messages in the past and I’m worried that she will start trouble when she sees me at his funeral…
She’s posting stuff on Facebook about how much they loved each other but I know it’s all in her head…
I’m devastated that Chris has passed away. We spent 10 good years together and never ever stopped loving each other…
How do I navigate this??
By putting one foot in front of the other and letting his family support you as you clearly have that. It must be so reassuring that you were able to hold him as he died, despite the fact you would rather he was here with you now.
It doesn’t matter where you for in, it matters that you do the right thing for you and do what you know he would want you to do.
It sounds like you have his family support too.
I’m sorry you’ve had to join this club but it is a supportive one and everyone understands because we’re all going through it.
Thank you for your reply…
I’m having a hard day today…
how do you think I should navigate the other woman situation??
They weren’t together when he passed but then again neither was I…
I realise that she must be grieving as well because she did love him but he told me he hated her because she got in the way of us…
His family also hate her
That’s a tricky one as I don’t know the situation and either of you or what he told each of you. I wouldn’t do anything, just focus on you if she’s there she’s there, hopefully she won’t do anything on his day but rise above it, for him, for his family.
Thank you… me and his mother are supporting each other… she’s the only person who understands the pain…
It’s crazy how close I’ve become to his family since his death… makes things seem even more tragic
We were very concerned about my husbands sister turning up at his funeral as his express wish was that she wasnt there ! (They hadnt spoken for decades ) so we told the funeral director we were worried she would turn up and he went to some lengths to make sure that she didnt find out but also so that he was aware she may cause problems and he said he would ask her to leave if necessary. She didnt find out in time but had a damn good try ! Hope this helps xxx
Unfortunately someone has posted the details on social so I know she will there …
I know she is going to try to play the victim
Just remember what the woman says or does those that knew him and you know the truth and that’s what matters and I would block her on Facebook so you can’t see it