Hi it’s exactly one month from today to 9 years since I lost my mum. I can’t get my head around it. Last few days all I’ve done is cried my eyes out. God my eyes sore and I’ve been curled up in ball in physical pain really painful it just doesn’t want to go away. I miss my mum so much I feel like my heart is going to come out of my chest. I keep being told it gets better with time. It’s simply not true like being told I’ll find a way to cope I’m not coping. Try telling that to my heart. Everyday feels the same it’s not the same without my mum in my life. I’ve lost huge part of me I know that my grief is uncontrollable I’m human and I feel emotion I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t feel emotion so to someone who’s never lost their mum how could you fathom how it feels to go through losing a mum. You can’t. November 24 2016 is a day I will never forget the day my world crashing down in a split second I even remember the exact time I lost my mum at 7.30am. My dad rung me and told me my mum has gone. Oh how I wish I’d held her hand telling her I loved her I don’t think I could have said goodbye I can’t even imagine saying goodbye to my mum. To say goodbye is to let go of my mum. No she’s my life. Mum one day I’ll join you just hold on I’m coming that day can’t come quick enough. I don’t want to be here no more there’s nothing keeping me alive
I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way. I can understand a little of what you’re going through as I lost my wonderful Mum almost 7 weeks ago. I still can’t believe that she’s not here because I miss her so so much. I’m functioning but I’m not coping at all. I’m on my own, and the house is so empty without her - all the love has gone now and it’s just 4 walls, it’s no longer a home. I dread the future without her, it looks so bleak and desolate, but I know for her sake I have to try. I don’t think she would want me to be moping around, I want to make her proud. But it’s so hard to work up any enthusiasm to do anything, so I just do what I have to do and basically spend the rest of my time crying. People have said it will get easier but I’m not so sure. Like you I want to be with her but I know I can’t until it’s my time. I suppose we just have to try to be strong and make the best life we can out of what we have got.
I’m sorry to ramble on so much, but I do feel your pain, and my thoughts are with you. Sending you hugs, and take care of yourself
Hi no you ramble on as much as you want. I’m always doing it. I’m sorry for your loss. It’s just not very good time for me at the moment it doesn’t help I’m in work today and thinking about my mum. She’s more on my mind than ever. It’s not easy trying to concentrate on work I’m getting verbal abuse in work from the I didn’t do this job as hard as it is but the thing that’s keeping me from the nuthouse right now. I reallly feel my heart is in my mouth I’m also dealing with so much going on in my life. I just need a break time to think and not get mentally stressed I’m so tired burned out from working. It’s no wonder I’m not thinking straight the only way out of it all is my life came to an end then I could be where I belong with my mum. I just wish it would happen