Feel like I am failing my children

Hi, just joined this group. I lost my mum to lung cancer a few days after my 40th birthday. She was 59. It happens quite quick (diagnosed in Feb) I cannot get images out of my head of seeing her so so different to how she was. She really was my best friend and my children spent so much time with her. I’m trying really hard to get into the Christmas spirit but really struggling with it all. Then feel really guilty because I know I am not being the best mum :sob:. I feel like I am drowning and can’t get on top of things and so disorganised!


Hello gemw, I’m sorry for your loss. I hope you can find some peace of mind by sharing your thoughts here. There’s a saying which has helped me focus during my grieving period, if you live in the past it will invite depression. If you live in the Future it will invite anxiety. If you live in the moment it will invite peace of mind. The images may never leave you but with time your perspectives may change and deal with them better.


Hi @gemw22 sorry you’re struggling at the moment. Don’t put yourself under pressure trying to be all festive and happy when you’re not. I’m sure your children will understand if Christmas is a more subdued version this year. Lean on friends and family members for support if you can. Be kind to yourself and just do what feels right for you. Best wishes xx

So sorry for your loss can i just say youve got this your so strong you can only do what you can
Have you thought about doing something for your mam like play her song celebrate her life i know its really hard i feel your pain be kind to your self day by day have you tried writti g down your feelings you can message me any time ill always be here for you