Feel so lost

My darling husband died 8 weeks ago he just woke up one morning said he didn’t feel too good and died he was 49.and the love of my life has gone I am broken and I am finding it hard picking myself up seems no point to anything.have big family and they think I am coping well just want thus ache inside to go. Thought I would be one to go first I am 65 never dreamt it would be him

Hello Maggiemay, I an very sorry for your loss. There are lots of people in this community who will know exactly how you are feeling so you are not alone. Everything I’ve read says we will emerge eventually and the ache you mention will ease. But it will take time, and there will be many ups and downs. The best advice I received early on was to take it one day, or one hour at a time. Also be kind to yourself and don’t isolate yourself. Take all the help you can get from family and friends, and anyone else who offers it. It is so hard to keep going but that is exactly what we all have to do. Don’t expect too much of yourself, and remember that each day you get through is a day nearer to the time when you will stop feeling so broken, and will learn to live with your loss.

HiMaggie im very sorry for your loss My advice is this have you seen your gp (medication helps me ) also theres Cruse bereavement councilling (i got this through my gp )and the Samaritains there open 24 7 to phone .Friends and family mean well but only take help from those who give you comfort (a day out may not be what you want but they may offer this )Give your self some me time your brain needs a rest from your nightmare it will still be there when you return to reality .Going out will bring back memories do it at your own pace .It will take as long as it takes .Keep coming back here theres plenty of members wholl help Colin (im 57 my wife was 41 she died 04032016 on her birthday)

Hi maggiemay I understand how you are feeling, I lost my lovely husband on 19th January, he was 55. Like you I feel as there is no point to anything and I feel lost and lonely. I have a supportive family and give them the impression that I am coping, when most days I just want to shut myself away and cry. People keep telling me I will eventually learn to live with my grief but at the moment that does not seem possible. Grieving seems such a lonely place but reading this forum you realise there are many suffering as we are.
Hopefully as we try and get through one day at a time our pain may not be as intense as it is at the moment x

Hi.
Maggiemay sorry to hear about your loss, I lost my wife also aged 49 last November and it’s 4 months tomorrow living with this nightmare, greiving unable to cope.

No one really helps i have been left alone without any support and also look after my three siblings.
Cooking, cleaning, shopping and currently working part time to make ends meet.

We didn’t ask anyone to alter our lifestyles but find ourselves in such circumstances having to suffer our loss in private, we all ache inside and only those of sharing our torment understand our inner feelings for our loved ones.

Take care of yourself and gain at least some comfort from the site.

Ravinder

Hi Maggiemay. I am so sorry for your loss. Its hard when they leave you behind. Telling everyone you are fine when all you want yo do is scream. Totally understand when you say there is no point. I think that its harder for the people that are left behind. Not sure that the ache ever goes you just learn to live without them. . Keep writing how you feel. People here listen and understand. Lots of love
Rita