Feel so lost

Just 4 weeks ago I lost the love of my life so suddenly, the saddest part is I was living in New Zealand with him but we are both British and decided we’d come back to retire, I came ahead of him leaving him to sell up and for me to find accommodation for when he arrived. Then out of the blue and not being able to get hold of him which was totally odd as we video call every day I got a neighbour to check on him and sadly he was found in the house deceased, I’m going through so many emotions of sadness, guilt of not being there and the awful thought of him dying all alone, I don’t actually know how I get through each day I just want to be with him,

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Dear Steffers, I am so sorry that you lost your husband in such traumatic circumstances. I hope that your family will support and help you. Sending lots of love and hugs.

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Oh my goodness, how devastating for you. I can feel all your emotions. Such difficult circumstances for you. Keep in touch on here as this is a very supportive site.

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Thankyou so much, I’m so glad I stumbled upon this site, the loneliness is overwhelming,

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Thankyou so much for your kind words, only just found this site but hopefully it will be my lifeline to try and get through my loss

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@Steffers
How completely devastating for you.
Such hard circumstances for you to be dealing with. None of our losses are easy, they are all different and difficult in their own way, because they all have same end result, we’ve lost the person we love most in all the world, out darling, our soulmate, our best , best friend.
But my heart is truly aching for you. That just sounds like such a tragic way for you to lose your soulmate.
Big, big hugs :hugs::hugs::hugs:

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Dear Steffers, This site helped me a lot. You can share everything here because we all lost our loved ones and know about despair, tears, and loneliness. Sending you lots of love and hugs.

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Thankyou, I’ve not really been able to talk to anyone about it, as we lived in New Zealand for 12 years and my daughter’s all lived here, 2 of them didn’t speak to me in all that time as they resented me moving so far away, my husband was my 2nd husband so not their Dad, everything is so overwhelming I couldn’t even attend the funeral as his children organised it so fast , I had COVID when they arranged it, I just livestream it, absolutely heartbreaking I will never recover from this. They are now trying to deal with all our assets as he had no will and feel so excluded from it all, my husband would be horrified if he knew what is happening,

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That is really traumatic what you are going through. I had to arrange the funeral all by myself with a bit of input from his parents( Dad 98 years old and Mum dementia). One of my husband’s nieces held a little speech and greetings from the parents because they were too ill to come to the funeral. They already lost a son a few years ago. I have my Darling’s urn in our bedroom upstairs as soon I could pick him up. Because my husband died at home I had the house full of ambulance staff, police and then he was picked up by the funeral director. I had to wait for the coroner’s verdict but could see my beloved husband at the funeral parlour before he was taken to the morgue. He looked in peace - like he just fell asleep. His birthday was about three weeks after he died and I had already his card and presents ready for him. Life is cruel. I have a Blu-Ray and USB stick with the funeral but I cannot watch it yet and put them away. It is for his parents when they are stronger. Might be a good idea to get advice regarding your husband’s estate speak to someone from the Citizen advise office or even get advice from a solicitor. Sending lots of love and hugs.

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What a heartbreaking experience you are having . I am so sorry for you . Please contact a solicitor to help you . Big hugs

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