Feeling lost

I lost my husband suddenly at the end of August at the age of 54. Although I feel I’m dealing with this as best I can and have a good support network around me I feel lost!
The worse thing is that I can’t imagine a future without him, what started as an ordinary day ended in my life being turned upside down.


Mand5 … I understand. I lost my husband the beginning of August he was one month shy of 51. I think the past couple weeks I’ve felt worse. Maybe it’s just kicking in that he is gone. Today was a bad day for me. That’s how I rate my days anymore…good one or bad.

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I’m so sorry for your loss, life really is rubbish at times. Like you I do exactly the same- rate my day as good day or bad!
I also feel it’s getting worse. You’re right it probably is just hitting me now too. I thought I was coping ok and had planned to return to work next wk but to be honest I don’t really think I’m ready but there’s a part of me telling me I need some normality in my life. I use to be so confident and sure what to do, now however it’s not so easy. I hope your pain starts to ease soon. Look after yourself.

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I was left with running 2 businesses so I have been working, which is hard. I’ve had a really hard time with paying things off with the insurance money. After the phone call or physically paying something I am a crying mess. My husband fell off the deep end during COVID with drinking. The family was doing tough love when he passed so I have guilt, sadness and anger along with the disbelief that this all just happened. I’m so forgetful now too. I feel like I’m in a daze most of the time. I too keep telling myself to snap out of it and find some normality. To be honest I was starting to think I was crazy or something until I found this site and read some posts others posted. Everyone is saying the same thing that I am living through. Your post stuck out because of it happening in August and it felt like I wrote your post. Thanks for listening and take care of yourself as well.