After losing my husband 15 weeks ago, I feel so lost and lonely without him. It seems to be getting worse. Does anyone know if it will feel better e er again. I think I’ve just come out of the shock of it all.
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So sorry for your lose, so many of us are wondering the same, reading some of the posts on here I am sure the answer is Yes, but as We are all different, at different speeds
Glad you posted, sharing out thoughts is a small but gteat step, take care
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Just watching The Good Ship Murder and crying my eyes out as we used to watch it together….like everyone else I can’t look forward
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So difficult to contemplate moving forward , but We must try and if We fail We try again, with perseverance and small steps We will get there, We owe it to our partners and if it was the other way around you would have urged them on to succeed in rebuilding a life albeit a different one
Take care Whisky, keep posting
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We watched that together with lots of other programmes which I’ve taped and haven’t been able to watch any yet. It’s all too raw. Take care.
Lovely to hear from people going threw the same. I felt so on my ow n. Look after yourself.
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That is so very true @Tony66 that we must try and keep trying, as you say we owe it to our loved ones. I know my partner would be urging me every step as he was such a positive person who saw life was for living. Gone far too soon 
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I ditto that!
Like so many I saw my husband through his illness, everyday. Wanted to! Loved him to the moon and back. I wanted no regrets. Yes it has taken it’s toll and my reward has been a bitter pill to swallow, loosing him.
BUT I know he fought so hard to try and stay with me. As he knew it would be so very hard for me left alone.
So I am trying to get by each day best I can. Sometimes reminding myself how hard he fought for me! and how upset he would be to see me struggle so!
I have no idea of my future but like almost all of as, we all know we can’t predict the future, which what has happened to so many of us.
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I find lm getting worse to l when out this morning just to my local shop and when l got in l was in a terrible state something just came over me and l could not stop crying 
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Even with my darling wife gone 3 months , I cannot get past witnessing her painful few end of days as the dreaded and insidious cancer took her precious life. Its of no consequence to me how things turn out, because every day now is tinged with uncertainty, lack of direction, just going through the motions of keeping head above water. I had utterly no idea how awful this grief is and the chaos it creates inside us. How people endure the effects of spousal loss for several years is uncomprehending.
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Sorry that that you experienced this wave of intense bout of grief for no rhythm or reason.
I had a conversation about this earlier and gave it a name “Ninja grief”. It is as if We are plodding along trying to rebuild and get our act together and then out of nowhere the Ninja goes into stealth mode and strikes hard and fast and disappears back into the shadows.
Hears hoping the visits will become much further apart as We continue our recovery
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Hi Dia. Feel just the same. Got up, doing things on automatic pilot and crying all the time. Forced myself to go to daughters to look after grandson who’s only 3. I love him but I was on automatic pilot till I’d finished. Then came home and all the emotions came rushing out. A lot of crying and trying how to carry on. I feel a bit calmer now, until the next time hey. I think you just have to follow it through until it subsides. Just like Tony and the Ninja Turtle. We’ll have to think of that when it happens next. Take good care.
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Yes just feel like l don’t want to do anything used get up have breakfast do my house work have a shower now l get up a d cry when my daughters or son rings put on a brave face but they can see their want me to go with them but although this house is tonight for 1 my husband work so hard on it so could never leave
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They say on Internet to take your time. It alters each hour at minute. One minute were fine and the next were crying and don’t know what to do with ourselves. It also says not to make any rash decisions, you could stay with one of your children until you feel a bit better. For myself, I’d rather be in my home with all John’s memories about. Unbearable some times to see them all. I havnt moved his shoes from wher he left them. That was September. I can’t bear to move them. Just feeling devastated.
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I lost my wife just over 4 months ago, I visit the 5 causes of grief every single day jumping from one to the other, every day I break my heart, like you I want it to heal, but I know it won’t, and people who don’t know say that time is a healer, but this won’t heal, someway we have to just live with it, sorry I’m not giving you a better response, but I hurt so much
I get memory photos come up on my phone and one is a video of Sel in Cornwall happy with his dogs…I wish I could send you it he looks so well…I’m afraid things won’t get better for me …it’s just a saying isn’t it…your spouse is one if not the main person in your life
I would like to see it, I had a bad dream, Sheena was in her hospital bed and she wouldn’t let me give her a little kiss and kept pushing my hand away, it was so real, I had to call my councillor the next day for a chat,
We have to get used to the new norm. It’s so very hard, I find it difficult to go into bed at night. This usually means I go around 2 30 - 3am . The loneliness doesn’t get any easier. I can be in a room full of people and feel so incredibly lonely because he’s not there with me. This is my fifth year and I still miss my husband as much as the day he died . I have joined a rock choir and I really like it but I get home I turn around to discuss it with him . I know that he would want me to carry on, he said this to me one day, he told me I was strong and I would be alright, yes I cope with the bills, the shopping, the jobs around the house but not strong without him emotionally. I feel for you all because we are all the same, grieving.
Its hard…i feel your pain, been nearly 4 years since my partner passed i dont cry every day now or wake up at 3 am to cry and chain smoke till the sun comes up anymore but rather ive settled into a deep resignation that my life will never be what it was, not a day goes by where i dont miss him and remember him and my nights are often filled with dreams and he is there and we are together again…15 weeks is nothing and I’ve no doubt you will be struggling massively just now…i just want to reach out and reassure you, i promise it does get easier to bear be patient and give yourself time and dont be scared by the depths of your grief…bear it and ride it out best you can…i never thought id survive my loss its been and still is a heavy hit probably shortened my life…he was 52…i am now 52…after 20 years together still adjusting…but be assured in time you will learn to bear your pain and live life again…it wont be quick it wont be easy and not in the way you once were either but pray for strength to endure and allow yourself to be guided through the darkness knowing that you will find a better day…May the Lord be with you and I am so sorry for your loss
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It’s normal to feel like that when you lose someone. I’m 4 months down now and feel I have a dark cloud hanging over me. I still have really bad anxiety sometimes over simple things. You’ve not only lost your soul mate you are a different person now. Part of me left with my partner. I’m no longer the person I was. You are still very early on in your grief. Be kind to yourself and ask for help if you have family or friends.
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