First birthday without mum and dad.

Is everybody else like me dreading the long weekend? weekends are bad enough but this long holiday. Is going to be very hard because it is leading up to my first birthday without mum and dad and last week I saw windows open at their old house. And this is causing me weird dreams I am having dreams telling the people to get out of that house and actual arguments is this normal? my grief has gotten worse. I had been going to their graves every Sunday but the last few times I just stood there and cried I have been waiting for grief counselling for 6 months I can’t do this on my own.


Hi @kate88, I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your mum and dad. As you say, birthdays and long weekends can be really difficult.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support soon, but I just wanted to make you aware of our Online Bereavement Counselling. You’ve said that you’ve been waiting for six months for counselling. Our Online Bereavement Counselling service currently has a very short waiting list. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home. If you wanted to find out more, visut:

Take care,

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Hi @kate88 I too am sorry to hear about the loss of your mum and dad. My dad died in February 2020 and since then and even when he was poorly, I found events really difficult. I have a family wedding coming up and because of Covid it’s the first real family event without my dad and up until recently I was really not looking forward to it at all. I think it’s natural to really miss people you love and care about so much when events both small and big happen and miss them all the time in fact.

I think it’s also normal to have strange and nice dreams, I think it’s all your thoughts and feelings mixed up and your mind going over things.

I think you have to do what’s right for you and try and be kind to yourself. It is really hard. I hope this all makes sense, I’m not very good at putting these things into words sometimes. But I hope some of it helps. Aniella xx

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