Funeral

I lost my nephew to suicide last month, just a few days after his 16th birthday. The grief is so raw and feels like it is taking up my whole body. We’ve just got the date for his funeral and I wondered if anyone has any advice on how to get through the day.

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I’m so very sorry - how desperately sad for you all. I don’t have any words of advice re the funeral I’m afraid . My husbands is next week and I’m dreading it. I did want to offer you my condolences though and let you know I’m thinking of ypu.

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Thank you. Sending love and strength to you for next week x

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I am so sorry for each of your losses. I dreaded my husband’s funeral in February, However, I took such comfort from the friends and family that were there, They were such a support. I cant imagine how hard it is to loose someone so young and under such tragic circumstances, but I hope you will be able to find the strength and comfort from people around you. Thinking of you both and sending love and hugs xx

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Hi,
I’m not at all sure how to reply. It’s such a delicate subject. All I can advise is to simply try and let the day happen. It will be tough but try not to stress about it. It happens no matter how we feel.
Go with it, people will be unbelievably kind to you and get you through. Let them. Surrender to their love and care and don’t try and do anything.
It’s bloody horrible. But in a strange way, necessary.
Be careful afterwards when they’ve all gone home. That’s when you need to take care.
I won’t say anything silly like ‘hope it goes well’ etc.
But you will come out the other side. And just at the moment that’s probably enough.
Take care. Much love.

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I was in an awful state the few days before my mums funeral in Feb. But on the morning, I woke up feeling in ‘functional’ mode, something to get through. I wasnt expecting it but it helped and people were caring etc. As its a young persons suicide, its obviously different and Ive been to one of those too.
People generally focussed their attention on her parents and partner.
Mazza x

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Hi lovely it was my partners funeral on Friday he lost his life to suicide in January, I thought I wouldn’t get through the funeral I thought I’d be a complete mess but it was actually lovely to see how many people loved him and how kind they all were , you go into function mode and become far stronger than you can imagine and finish the day feeling good about yourself for this , hope this helps you sending you much love Sue xxx

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Im so sorry for your loss and I understand how you are dreading the funeral. I lost my sister recently and I also didnt know how to get through the funeral but I did and so will you. Go with the flow, dont feel like to have to be strong there are no rules to grief. Try to look at it as a celebration of his life, it helps to talk to people who remember the happy boy he once was. I hope it gives you comfort.
Sending love x

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Thank you for your kind words. Sending you love and strength x

Hi @TJH I was thinking of you and wondering how you coped with your husbands funeral this week? xxx

It’s tomorrow. I am absolutely dreading it. It’s 7 weeks since he died - the pain is unbearable :frowning:
Thank you for thinking of me, that’s so thoughtful. T

@TJH1 I hope those there scoop you up and hold you close and you can draw some comfort from them. That’s how I got through it. The pain is unbearable, but I hope somehow you find the strength from those around you Know that I am thinking of you . Sending love and hugs xxx

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Hi all. It’s a week since my dad’s funeral and as some of you said, you just get through it somehow. Everyone said how lovely the service was. My sister and I wrote it and chose the poems and songs. We wanted it to be a celebration of his life and included many photos and memories of the times he spent with friends and family when he was well. There was a massive turnout for him and most people that attended the crematorium went back to the venue we had booked for the wake. People that hadn’t attended the funeral came to the wake to chat about the good times and reminisce. There were in excess of 100 people there and it was very uplifting sharing stories that some of us had forgotten. To anyone anticipating the funeral, I hope it gives you as much comfort knowing your loved one was held in so many people’s hearts. Even though I miss him terribly, thinking back to that day and knowing how much he enriched the lives of his friends and family gives me the strength to carry on and be proud of the man he was.

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