Hello everyone. I’m new to this forum. I lost my lovely husband two years ago in April to lung cancer. At times the missing him gets too much especially at weekends and bank holidays.
I work full time and money isn’t plentiful. I just feel at times it’s work, sleep, eat and grief.
It’s hard to find motivation in anything at times, even just cooking a meal for yourself and you feel so isolated. The bits of advice I’ve seen about grief is that you just have to go through it, there’s no way round it.
I hope it’s true that time is a healer. Jac
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@Madaboutcats
I’m so sorry for your loss. I too lost my husband in April21. It was his funeral two years ago today. I can resonate with everything you say. I feel I have been on a white knuckle ride ever since. I don’t work and have struggled every day to find purpose. I have felt what is the point. Life has no meaning. I went to see the GP and finally am taking medication. I am hoping this will help. I am trying to learn to live with my grief and hopefully one day find purpose and not wake up feeling terrified every day. Sending hugs x
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Thank you Nel, I am so sorry for your loss too.
This is it isn’t it? You feel there’s no purpose to anything.
I went to the GP too. He upped my anti depressants and gave me a number for a bereavement counsellors who I kept ringing and they never picked up.
Until recently I was drinking every night but I’ve got hold of that and now just have a few at the weekend. I guess I was using it as a crutch to block the hurt.
There’s no answers x
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Hi @Madaboutcats , I can resonate with what you have said, my husband died in March 2021. Like you I work, just feels like a continuous merry go round of work, eat, sleep and every weekend housework and food shopping. I wished I could have retired early to spend more time with my husband before he died, but financially it wasn’t possible and now I feel robbed of our retirement time together.
I don’t think time is a healer I miss him as much today as I did when he first died, I’ve just learned to adjust to my new life without him which isn’t easy. I have supportive friends and family but nothing can replace not having him by my side. Part of me died too when he died.
I’m sorry I can’t be more positive.
Sending love
Debbie x
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Hi,
I am so sorry to hear about your sad losses.
It terrifies me how much this sadness, pain and loneliness is making me feel.
Will it never end?
Xxxx
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“Madaboutcats, post:1, topic:66435, full:true”]
Hello everyone. I’m new to this forum. I lost my lovely husband two years ago in April to lung cancer. At times the missing him gets too much especially at weekends and bank holidays.
I work full time and money isn’t plentiful. I just feel at times it’s work, sleep, eat and grief.
It’s hard to find motivation in anything at times, even just cooking a meal for yourself and you feel so isolated. The bits of advice I’ve seen about grief is that you just have to go through it, there’s no way round it.
I hope it’s true that time is a healer. Jac
[/quote]
Hi Debbie and Alyson and Steve, thank you for your responses. I also feel part of me died the day he died.
You miss all the little things about them but most of all you miss them for them 
Yes sometimes in the past I have felt so scared of how intense the hurting is. I know that when I’ve had a good blub though it’s like a release until the next time.
I have had a few family occasions since and I find them the hardest as he loved spending time with my family. The other week I went to a birthday party for someone in the family and I just wanted to run out the room and sob. It is so hard.
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Hello @Madaboutcats sorry for your loss. My husband died of lung cancer on 25th April of this year. He was only diagnosed in February. Took him so quickly. He was only 57 in March. I am off work at the moment I was told by MacMillian nurses to take time off when they found out it had spread to his brain. We had the bed delivered so he could come home. He never made it. Sat eating his ice cream in the hospital and next minute he was gone. Doesn’t make sense. If I had known it was our last day together I would have said so many things to him. I can’t even remember if we held hands that day. I was curled up in the seat reading and he watched his Netflix. Feel cheated.
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Hi Rammie, I am so sorry. Why just why do we have to go through all this. My husband’s lung cancer also spread to his brain. In the end it was renal failure and fluid on the chest wall that killed him.
I think at first you just go round in a daze, numb then after a while you have horrible feelings they’re not there or anywhere on the earth anyway and they’re not going to walk through that door anymore.
I feel for anyone going through this, it’s horrible
Take care
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