Hiya pam and Jack,
Its awful draing and the most horrendous journey, I honestly dont think people know how to reactto our grief, I think they would sooner ignore us then talk about how we are feeling.
But I keep telling myself Gra would be proud I have got this far.
I never thought I would.
Hugs Jo xxxx
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Morning all, another lovely Sunday, it’s our wedding anniversary today and the pain is just unbearable, a friend said to me weeks ago when it’s our anniversary we will go out for a meal and today has arrived and no mention of going out, I’ve made myself get up and showered and I will spend the day reminiscing of our amazing wedding 
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Thank you Ron
Believe me when I saw all the wonderful caring
Messages of support I cried buckets.
I hung onto your hand I needed that and I haven’t let go yet.
Doreen x
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Thank you Jo for your needed support.
A long dark night helped by all our very caring
and understanding friends,
Much love to you all.
Doreen x
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Thank you willow
I am so grateful for your support.
I reached out I was I think at one of my lowest
Moments.
There every body was actually talking to me.
That meant everything to me late at night
when I was so alone and just so desperate.
Lots of love to us all
Doreen x
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Hi @Lydia2 , I am with you on this, I am fortunate that I live in a lovely, albeit, small, home, it is set in a beautiful (to us, it started as a field and most of it still is!) environment surrounded by nature which has been encouraged for the last 40 odd years and we designed and converted it ourselves ( with a builder). After my wife died suddenly and unexpectedly in March, like everybody on here I was in utter turmoil but slowly I feel we are both here, I feel I will join here at some point, in the meantime it is upto me to continue what we started and I am content with that.
I still consider myself married, I still consider I have a wife even tho’ she is not physically present but certainly spiritually and if anybody “in authority” wants to argue that - go ahead. I do miss her terribly, I do relapse but I look at my situation and know there is a road ahead together.
“Above you are the stars, below you are the stones.
As time passes, remember…
Like a star should your love be constant,
Like the earth should your love be firm.
Possess one another, yet be understanding.
Have patience with each other,
For storms will come, and they will go quickly.
Be free in giving of affection and of warmth.
Have no fear, and let not the ways or words of the
Unenlightened give you unease.
For the Old Gods are with you,
Now and always!”
A traditional Pagan blessing to you all.
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Thank you Lydia
You have had a terrible experience to have your
Wonderful husband die beside you.
You will like me always dread the time and date
no matter how many weeks or months pass.
I love the thought they are waiting for us.
However to just go together one day of our
choosing would be better just somehow hold hands and walk away.
The support I received last night when I was so low was incredible.
I really knew then that these wonderful people are actually there, here,now just waiting to help
no matter what time of day or night.
I thank god for them as I know they are also
going through it.
Much love and comfort Doreen x
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Thank you so much for the loving support
much love and comfort .
Doreen x
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That is lovely, thank you. I keep an open mind about all things.
Like you, we fell in love with this house when it was still being built. We are surrounded by fields and it met all our dreams and wishes, we have made a few changes, mostly to meet our daughter’s special needs. I could never leave unless I really have to. It is full of lovely memories, though after just 4 months most of those still make me cry.
Living here is a double edged sword and it can be a bit of a problem in the depths of winter. We are at the end of a lane, no pavements, no street lighting, no gritting, etc. and the recent floods left us marooned for a couple of days. But the views and peacefulness make up for an odd day of inconvenience.
I can watch deer, red kites, hares and rabbits and we have a badger set a few yards away. The squirrels are another matter! But even they make me smile. Nature is a wonderful balm to a sore and tortured soul. I wish it was a little more effective today. Sundays are always the most painful day of the week for me.
Hoping everyone here finds some peace today.
Xx
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Hello rosiejack
Thank you so much for your message of support
It means such a lot to me.
I was really low last night and I reached out and there every body was trying to help and support.
Just amazing and so heart warming.
I know what you mean though about friends
ringing you up but not really listening I have had that also.Why bother? and also not picking up
Some people don’t really want to hear about
Our grief.
Lots of love and comfort
Doreen x
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Morning liro
I too hope every one has a peaceful and as calming a Sunday as is possible.
Much love to everyone.
Doreen xx
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Hello Jane
Happy anniversary to you both.
It still is your anniversary as it was ours in June and I bought cards from me to Sam and from my Sam to me and put them on the mantle
Piece.
I did remind my brother who had always sent us. a card.
He said he bought one a while earlier but now didn’t think it was appropriate
He saw how I upset I was when I explained
It was still our wedding anniversary.
So brought it around next day.
I am very sorry the outing promised for a meal
Has not happened.
People often just say things never realising how
really important it is to us trying to cling on to some sort of normal life.
I have lost count now of the people who have
said they will pop round to see me and never do.
I know how you feel believe me and I am definitely here for you.
Much love and comfort.
Doreen x
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Hi Doreen, thank you for your kind words it’s been a difficult day I’ve kept busy but waves of sadness just come over me.
That’s a lovely thing to do up buy the cards.
When did you loose your lovely husband? I keep having flashbacks that I don’t want to see but I don’t know how to block them out of my mind.
Sending you all the love & strength
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Hi Jane from another Jane, I am sorry you find yourself here. You will find lots of support from the lovely people on here.
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Hello Jane
I lost my wonderful Sam on 27th. April we were together 3 years and married 40 years.
I was desperately sad because we missed our
Anniversary together which was 16 June.
In hospital he talked about getting out to get
My anniversary card.
I laughed and said it’s only April our anniversary
Is not until June.
He laughed back and said to me what am I thinking about.
He died a week later and I had no idea he was going to die
Looking back I wonder if he knew somehow?
I do know he loved me very much as he told me so every day and I also told him.
He told me to the moon and back.
I like every one on here am finding life difficult
and I wish with all my heart things could be
different for us all.
Sending much love and comfort to all
Doreen x
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Hi Sam your husband sounds like a wonderful man, I know how much Tony loved me he told me every day as I did him.
I just want the pain to stop and have him back but neither of those will happen
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Hi Jane thank you for your kind words, it does help speaking to people that are unfortunately in the same position doesn’t it?
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Sorry Doreen I know Sam was your husband I’m trying to type through my tears
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Hello Jane
don’t worry, I know how hard it to think straight
never mind through tears and abject misery.
I forget things,get mixed up and just generally
don’t behave like my normally assured self.
My best friend tells me it is stress and grief.
Just coping with life now on your own being
Responsible for everything is overwhelming.
Do you have some family or children to help you
Through this terrible time?
Love and comfort
Doreen x
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Thanks Doreen.
I have my adult daughter that lives at home but she has her own life to lead.
I only have a brother and sister in law and we meet once a month, a couple of friends but not very close friends.
Do you have family?
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