Good days and bad days

It’s a bit cliche, but we all have ups and downs. Today is the worst one I’ve had in a while. I’ve got two of my grandsons for the next two days, and I don’t know how I’m going to do it. I believe that might be the cause actually, because my wife loved them so much and established some traditions for places to go and things to do that I’ll have to endure for the next couple of days. I can’t tell them and I can’t tell their mother (my daughter) how I am feeling, so I’m just spilling it out here.
I’ve got to move past these horrible mood swings that seem to own me right now and figure out how to move on.

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Why can’t you tell them! What harm will it do for them to understand how your feeling! My grandson asked me all the time and I was honest with him. It sucks, it’s harder to hide it.

How old are they? I am assuming they are quite young from the sound of it and probably wouldn’t understand. Try and enjoy your time with them. Xx

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It’s good you can spill your feelings on here but it may help if you spoke to your daughter. She may be feeling the same.
The mood swings are just part of grieving. I still have a rollercoaster of emotions each day and find going with how I’m feeling rather than trying to bottle emotions is the only way I can get through the day.
Hopefully you will find that having your grandchildren isn’t as enduring as you think. Maybe make some new traditions with them.

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@AceHigh
I think that you really need to have a heart to heart with your daughter and discuss and plan together how you can look after your grandchildren. You may not wish to just yet, which is understandable but it would be nice if you could, but on your terms. You can make your own traditions with them.

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To all who voiced concern. We did discuss my feelings a bit and it helped quite a lot. The day went much better than anticipated. Another day in the books toward the direction of my new reality. Thanks for your support.

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Glad it went ok. I have often found the build up for an event is much worse than the event itself. Small steps but each one another achievement.

@AceHigh
So pleased you discussed your feelings with your daughter and the day went well. You will gradually establish your own routines with your grandchildren.