Grief now surfacing.

Hi, I lost my Dad and my father-in-law within a fortnight of each other last October, both deaths were sudden, my Mum had bladder cancer and sadly she lost her battle with it in March this year. Because we had so much to cope with we didn’t have time to grieve properly at the time of each death, this week the sale of both parents houses are going through and all of a sudden I am a wreck! I have so many emotions and trying to cope with it is so difficult, we have great family but as its both myself and hubby that are in the same position we are trying to support each other. I am trying to tell myself that how we are feeling, even the sudden anxiety and tears , is normal and not me just not coping. We miss them all so much! We have an eleven year old who is being absolutely brilliant, she had had fantastic support from her school through all of this which has helped us all.

Hi Maesiemoo,

Welcome to the Sue Ryder Online Community. I’m so sorry that you’ve had so many losses in such a short time. It sounds as though it’s been overwhelming and it’s not surprising that it’s taken time for the grief to sink in.

All the tears and anxiety sound very normal - it’s better to cry if you need to than to bottle it all up.

I’m glad that you’ve found our site and I hope that it helps a little bit to be able to write things down here. We have lots of other members here who know what it is like to lose a loved one. Here are some recent conversations from other members who’ve lost a parent - you may find it helpful to read or reply to some of these:

https://support.sueryder.org/community/coping-death-loved-one/grief-taken-me-surprise
https://support.sueryder.org/community/coping-death-loved-one/lost-my-mum-and-only-just-starting-grieve
https://support.sueryder.org/community/coping-death-loved-one/struggling-losing-my-dad

Hi Priscilla, thanks for replying to my post. It is good to have somewhere like this to be able to write things down, talking to people that aren’t connected to you but understand what you are going through helps a lot.

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