Grief on grief - resilience

I lost my mum in March, traumatic and unexpected, I tried to save her and I couldn’t.
I had started a new job in November, this is the second time this has happened, in 2019 I was diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer.
I am struggling with returning to work, I went back in May but whilst I feel like my body is there, my head is not. My manager makes sympathetic noises but not sure of any substance or compassion.
On Monday, I had to let my beautiful cat go to sleep, old age & diabetes caught up, no more mum let me leave with dignity.
So now my house truly is empty, my mum has gone, my companion who never left my side, has gone.
How much can we take, when does the universe say enough, let this human being exist beyond simply functioning.


Hi @Daisy57 ,

Thank you so much for sharing this with the community :blue_heart: I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I just wanted to let you know that you have been heard and you are not alone.

Take good care,

Hi, what a terrible time for you, I am sorry for the pain of loss that you’re experiencing. I think what you’re feeling is entirely understandable and normal. Be kind to yourself and take the time to adjust to the losses you’ve suffered. Five months on from my Mum’s unexpected death I still feel like I’m in a fog of gloom. Going to work brings distraction but I’m not really motivated to do much socially. I have accepted that this is part of the grieving process and that eventually these feelings will pass. Take care xx

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Thanks so much for your reply. How are you getting through at work? I loved my job, it’s now all completely meaningless. As for managing my team, they just irritate me!

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I work as a teacher with infants so once the day has started with them, I seem to get distracted! I agree, it’s not so easy managing the time with colleagues because they no longer really ask me how I am, but I’ve got used to coping with the small talk. Another thing that helps me is I’m part-time, working 3 days a week. To be honest, when I first returned to work from bereavement leave of 5 weeks, my heart wasn’t in it. I just forced myself into the routine so I do empathise with how you feel…xx

Well little uns are the best levellers, and often so brutal honest!
Maybe that is the answer, I need to look to go part time. Thank you xxx

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