Grief v Self pity ?

Thank you chambres
I loved your post and it struck a cord.
I’ve only just found your reply. I wish this site had a away of telling us that there had been an update to our conversations. It’s so easy to miss things.
Loveland Light.
Geoff

Hi Valerie
I nearly missed your post.I wish this site had a way of informing us of updates to our posts. I can empathise with you to a degree. I often wondered whether I ever lived up to my darling wife’s expectations of me. But totally against the grain once Anne had been given what she said was her death sentence she said she loved me - oh so often. Believe me Adrian loved you to bits. Guilt is a massive part of the grieving process. I don’t know why but I’ve been feeling guilty about things that happened to Anne and I that go back 20-30yrs. How weird is that? Perhaps good people like yourself have too high expectations of themself.? Me too. But we are just human when it comes down to it: warts and all! Even our lived ones were not perfect yet we forget that because of the unconditional love we have for them.
Love and Light.
Geoff

Hi Sadie
Sorry I nearly missed your post. I wish this site had a way of informing us of current updates to our conversations. Or have I missed something? I can see exactly where you are coming from. I too get confused between grief, self pity and a general sadness for the loss of what used to be. Anf I too am a different person. The spark has gone out of my life and it will never again be rekindled.
Loveland Light
Geoff

Hi Geoff, Sorry that you have been finding it hard to know if you’ve had replies. You can get email notifications of replies from the site. If you don’t know how to switch these on, just let me know, or email online.community@sueryder.org and I can do this for you.

1 Like

Hi Val, I’m glad to hear you are going to try our online bereavement counselling, I hope that you find it helpful.

1 Like

Hi Sadie, absolutely agree with your comments about self pity. Every word I can relate to. When Brian died he took me with him and left this pathetic shell of a woman. I don’t much like me and feel in limbo land. So I agree we do start crying for us, the life we have been left with, ourselves and what we have become. The loss of someone that loved and took care of us. Who loved us faults and all. Now we have lost our identity.
Take care and have a good trip home.

Pat xxx

1 Like

Hi Pat
I/we must find value in our lives - I thought I had a purpose in life and now I don’t think so

Maybe one day Pat , this different woman that we are will be able to find direction in live
Love
Sadie x

1 Like

Yes I did. I feel more positive than I have for many days! Kevin was brilliant and I have booked another session for next week. I am so glad of this service.

1 Like

Yes I did. I feel more positive than I have for many days! Kevin was brilliant and I have booked another session for next week. I am so glad of this service.

1 Like

Your so right Sadie, that is exactly it. We have lost our reason for living. Some of us might not have realised that we had been devoting our lives to our partners but when they leave us we are like lost souls. I am sure we will find a direction in life we just need a good map to direct us. Are you home yet.
Pat

1 Like

Arrived this morning Pat!!! Now is going back to normal and need to sleep- xx

1 Like

Hi Priscilla
I managed to find the tick box. Thank you so much.
Love and Light
Geoff

Back to top