I know several on here are like me, waking in the mornings & feeling sick, breathless & like you’ve been punched, it’s only been just over two months for me but is there anyone who’s had this & got over it & if so how long did it take you? xx:heart:
I lost my darling husband just over two years now. I would say that I haven’t got over it and I never expect to but I can deal with every day life now and I don’t burst into tears when something goes wrong in the house but nevertheless I still feel sad and miss him when he pops into my mind, which is often but I have ways of distracting myself from tears so they are more or less under control. The thing is I’m sure you will put your grief in its place and not visit it too often but that may take quite a while. I send you love and hugs and be kind to yourself.
It will be 4 years since my husband died in April. It does get easier but you never get over your loss. I still think of Peter all the time. I don’t think there is a time line, we all grieve differently. I try to distract my thoughts. Doing crafts have really helped. Special dates or a song can trigger tears. It is really early days for you. I used to wake up in the morning and think it all a bad dream. Now I guess I am coming to terms with my loss and I now think of Peter and myself in happier times rather than the months before his death when he was ill. Take care of yourself!
Emz i dont think this is something you ever get over im 16 months into this awful journey and i still wake up feeling rubbish. Lots of things trigger me off this morning it was a film on tv it was one jim always watched and i found myself just looking at tele not hearing anything just in a world of my own . Hope you find some peace soon but its very early days for you x
@Carol9 @Teddybear @Misprint Thank you, this feeling is so overwhelming, I just wish I could fast forward to when it eases or softens; I know grief will never go, that’s the burden we gain through are deepness of love we all have but just need it to be more bearable xx:heart:
Hi I’m just coming up to twelve months and I don’t feel any different in fact I would say I feel worse. I still have that heavy sickly feeling in my chest and still don’t eat properly. I don’t think I have accepted it yet either which is worrying. Still hope for a brighter day. Sorry not very encouraging.x
I like your posr.it gives us hope that we will all feel better in time thank you
@Loobyloo2 Im so sorry to hear that. It’s still early for me but I’m wondering when the actual acceptance will come, moments I have, I think she’s gone & I can’t stop crying but other times it’s as if she’s just gone away & she’ll be back(know it sounds crazy) can’t accept the never ever seeing her again though!
Love & peace to all
Acceptance doesn’t just come it is a slow procedure as we travel through our grief. No shortcuts I’m afraid. Very slowly you will start to accept and adapt. There will be ups and downs all the time but we learn how to cope with them. We learn to smile and even laugh again, we literally have to learn to ‘walk’ again. I doubt any of us will ever really find a true acceptance, we never stop loving or forget but we do learn to live again and find pleasure in our memories.
Thank you @Pattidot, you’ve put that in such a nice way. No I only wish there was a shortcut or a way of fast forwarding some how! The thought of the Spring, summer & future in general coming without her is a painful thing. I don’t Really want to experience it but unfortunately have to carry on like we all do. Thoughts with everyone going through this
I know Emz if only we could be spared such pain. We never expected it to be so hard did we. Take each day and try to give yourself a pat on the back when you manage to get through a hard day or do something new. Some people start a journal and they can keep a record of what they manage to accomplish. I wrote down everything I did in a day just to prove I was still functioning. You would be surprised at how you change over the months.
Thanks Pattidot, yes we can only but take it day by day (still early days) xx