Hate the lonely nights

So its 4am again. Ive been awake since 2. Tried everything to get back to sleep. Its always the same

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Yes same for me up at 4 after wild dreams usually, cry for an hour get ready for work…mornings are the worst…alone with my memories and regrets…its hard im sorry for you as i know these are the most painfully lonely hours

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Thanks Pony
So nice to connect with someone in the night

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Ive been so low…no friends no nobody to hear me…this groups chat is very active …last couple of days i wake and look here…after 7 months of crying in the morning …im cying now …perhaps thisn s a little hope for me to speak to a living soul. Hope you find this group a help…i find it hard to navigate …im humbled by the grief of others…

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That’s my wake up time too, I’ve been up for two hours after the usual 3/4 hours of ‘false’ sleep. This is what I call it because it seems that I am half awake anyway when I get those few hours of nodding off.

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Yes thats what it is false sleep …its why i remember all my crazy dreams…fitful broken sleep and dreams that make me feell too much…im more able to cope between the hours of 10 and 3…sounds mad…but when evening comes again…

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I se.em to have a few good nights followed by some bad ones when I can’t sleep and usually end up feeling vulnerable and sçared of being in my own. I tell myself I’m being silly that I’m safe and warm etc but at times they just sound like empty words.

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Solost
That describles it exactly

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Shirleymc
I only sleep off and on for the whole night if ive had a couple of glasses of wine which i try not to do every night.
Ive bought a new bed, we intended to anyway. I bought it from the government widows pension, did you claim?
I have new soft sheets and i cuddle 2 pillows.

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I wake at 2 every morning and end up having toast and tea - hence weight gain!!
I have always been a emotional eater -
The worse part is having to be at work for 7.30 only having a couple of hours sleep.
It’s been just over 6 months now since my Geoff left me and it’s not getting any better

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I sleep for a few hours thanks to a couple of glasses of wine., but then I’m awake for hours and hours, I never want to know what time it is and the night seems endless. I tell myself that since I’m warm and comfortable I have nothing to worry about so I should enjoy just lying there. Hours later, I start to feel really tired just when the time to get up is approaching and then I feel knackered and it’s the start of another groundhog day.

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I’m like you. I lost my husband in September 2021. My family 2 sons a daughter and partners are absolutely great but when they go home it’s just me, glasses of wine and tv or a book. Don’t sleep well at all and always tired but doing my best to carry on x

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I too bought a new bed ,bedding and carpet but akthough my bedroom looks diffeent I still mi ss his presence and have some bad nights. Grief plays tricks on you and hits you when you least expect it. I go to sleep ok but will wake up after about 4 hours sleep.and then I diose until abour 6am when that early morning anxiety kicks in and it’s too early to get up.
I don’t know how to break the pattern . Thinking of all of you who are walking this path and wishing you all a peacefully day ans night xx

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Hi Jane I, too wake around 4am with my mind whirling away. It’s a very lonely time and I feel totally alone and overwhelmed. I do yoga breathing and try to get back to sleep, if that doesn’t work I put on the radio or a podcast to calm my thoughts. One podcast that seems to work is Stories for Sleep - Nothing Much Happens. I hope these help.

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4am does seem the worst time to wake. For me it was 4am 28th October that my wife of 47 years died holding my hand and I kissed her goodbye. If I wake at that time it’s total meltdown.

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Mike, I’m sorry you have to deal with that memory. It is shocking and I have a similar memory that I mustn’t share because it could upset people who would read it.

@Ed9 Thank you. At 4am this morning my grandson was born in the same hospital exactly 13 weeks since my wife died. That will alleviate it for me.

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Ah that’s lovely news, congratulations Mike

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