I think the last account is now in my name only. That makes me so sad. The only thing now left is the loan for his very expensive hearing aids. He only had them a couple of months and it is a 5 year plan. The audiologist is going to come and test my hearing. She says she will adapt them for me. At least it will keep a connection to him. It does feel as though you are wiping them out as though they never existed except in your heart which is breaking. Xx. Sandra
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I felt like this when I changed all the accounts and had the cars put in my name and he was taken off the insurance. There’s always something to twist the knife!
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I think I have got all of them. The main bank account changed from joint to sole today. I have kept his mobile number and e mail account to pick up any strays. Everyday I check them almost as though I hope he will answer. Over the weekend his premium bonds were paid into the account. It seems so final and makes it even more real. His ashes are not interred yet as the ground is too hard despite all the rain. That will be the next milestone.
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Hi Sandra, I feel the same when I give away his clothes, books or DVDs. I feel bad about it but I am not interested in Doctor Who etc. I only bought the DVDs for him and also the computer books and magazines. His car is still on our driveway but I have to sort the paperwork out soon (the car is uninsured and SORN now) so his nephew can pick it up. But every time I want to sort the paperwork I start crying and cannot carry on. We cannot erase our husbands and partners because they are always in our hearts, minds, memories, and souls, but it is so hard to carry on without them. I think we will always feel guilty about changing anything related to our loved ones possessions or accounts. Sending love and hugs.
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@Annaessex you seem better in your recent posts. Are you just having a better spell. Hopefully the pills are starting to work. I had to sell his car whilst he was still alive as it was on finance. I would not be able to keep up the payments and dont drive. Hopefully I can get his hearing aids adapted to me. The audiologist has suggested I can. His clothes apart from his suits are gone. I have to do a full on the dvd collection. We have 193. Many I am not interested in but can’t face that yet.
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Hi Sandra - re the DVDs, have your considered music magpie? When I felt stronger I sold quite a lot of my husbands DVDs & CDs to them - I could not watch or listen to them, it brought in quite a bit of cash for me. Just something to consider. Alison xx
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Thanks Alison. I knew there were some sites but haven’t investigated yet. Just don’t seem to have the energy. It would make the house look so bare. Xx.
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Hi - it took me well over a year to sell them, no rush is there. Everything takes time. xx
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As I am now virtually a prisoner in my own home I have nothing but time. I hopefully arranged for the council to collect my rubbish from the side of the house. I can’t rely on my neighbours goodwill forever. Or rather I am not willing to.
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Erasure is exactly how it feels . Taking her name off our joint bank account , the council tax,the car insurance and the deeds to the house it was all so painful. That was 18 months ago. My heart broke when I lost her and continues to break every day.
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@peterj
It’s really distressing removing our partner’s names from everything. I lost my partner 32 weeks tomorrow and I haven’t had his name removed from the deeds. My solicitor said not to worry until I decide to move. I still think he is here with me. Anything to give us some comfort.
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Same advice about deeds with me ! Wait until i move … god this journey is just awful … i still feel like its not real some days … i wish it wasnt 
xxx
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It doesn’t feel real to me either. We all have our little sayings, don’t we? Well, over the past few days, I keep remember a lot of my husband’s I had forgotten. He’s so much in my head a lot of the time. Xx
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Same here … i was saying one of his sayings to my puppy today … im sure she must feel she knows him ! She even sleeps on his chair some days 
even though she never met him and the amount of times she has just sat nicely whilst i bawl my eyes out !! Bless her xx
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How lovely, she must feel his presence around. Xx
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Do you think so ? I think she understands something for sure ! Dogs are very clever ! They know your loss … xx
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There’s no doubt they have a lot of perception and, bless her, she knows there’s sadness in your house. My brother’s dog is amazing, He used to be quite boisterous with me but since I lost my husband, he’s very gentle and senses I’m not the same. Xx
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I kept my husband’s name on our deeds as well. It’s a comfort to know he hasn’t been taken off everything. Most of our finances were sorted while he was still with me. I can’t get rid of his clothes yet, most of his shoes have gone, but it’s only been 11 weeks and it would be far too painful to let everything go. There has to be a right time, and that’s going to be different for everyone.
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8 months on and i cant bear to get rid of anything of his apart from some of his football shirts !!! I keep finding stuff of his and its still too sad for me to do anything with them !!! X
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I had to take Jo’s name off the deeds because I needed to sell the house . I know the law is the law but it then seemed so final, like she was never here.That was eighteen months ago.I’m now in a very small flat and although I’ve got support from friends and family I feel so alone. This is so unbelievably painful. At my age I’ve lost parents and many friends over the years but this is something totally different .
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