Having a bad few days

I was asked yesterday by a neighbour how my wife was. He was shocked, it was not his fault, he genuinely didn’t know. I was, luckily, close to home, went in and just broke down. I followed that by not being able to sleep, then was really ill during the night with d and v. Rose and I used to help each other, being a retired nurse she would have known exactly what to do and say, I just panicked and it took me all night in a state before it eased. I honestly do not know how I am going to cope on my own. I don’t know if I can do this.

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Dear @Malc39200, it is so sad to read you have had a few bad days. I don’t really know what to say that can help you, but just wanted to make sure you did not go to sleep without having your post replied to, as it is a Sunday night and not many people might be logged onto this forum. I hope tonight is a better night for you. Please take care.

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Thank you Abdullah. I appreciate what you have said.

Im so sorry for how you are feeling. It is hard when you have to tell people, be it neighbours or dealing with legal stuff. I have had times when I have managed to get through telling people and other times totally collapsed in tears and just felt so bad the rest of the day. People also react in different ways --some avoid you cause I guess they don’t know what to do or say and others are so understanding. It is hard to understand the devastation of grief if you haven’t experienced it -the way we feel can change day by day hour by hour and sometimes we are coping and other times it feels like we can’t cope .I don’t have all the answers but just want you to know that you aren’t alone x

Hi Malc, just like Abdullah and Trac and many more I’m with you. We are in it together, just keep in contact when you are able to.

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Jim1 and Trac, thank you

That’s exactly it, @Jim1, we are here to look out for each other. Hope your day is a but better today, @Malc39200.

Hello Malc39200, I am new to this forum, struggling to cope with losing my Mum during lockdown, hence why I reached out.
I saw your post and just had to respond, hope you don’t mind. Did you have a better day on Monday? Every day can be so different can’t it. There is no magic wand on here for any of us, but I have to say that having never reached out like this before i. e. to complete strangers, I am finding it so helpful as you can say things you are afraid to say to friends or other family and you will never be judged. Knowing that each person reading your post knows just how you feel, the sense of loss and despair, really makes you feel less alone. I do hope you feel the weight of support from doing this. Keep sharu g and reaching out, day or night. As you can see from the hour of my post, sleep is not something that comes easily these days, so there is always someone around to listen. Keep in touch and let us know how you are doing x

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Thank you. As you say, sleep is not easy at all.