Heartache when alone

Early on in the grief journey I know. Lost my beloved husband of 57 years eight months ago. I am coping, adjusting to various tasks, shopping without him, minor repairs etc. go out with friends and can talk about my husband. But when I am alone and say his name the agony of losing him swamps me, just as bad as at the beginning of my grieving. Has anyone else felt this and does anyone know if, in time, this does not hurt quite so much. Live on my own but have support from friends

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Hello @susbob, I am so sorry for the loss of your husband. As you say, eight months is early days in the grief journey. Many of our members have lost a loved one and are in different stages of their journeys; I hope you find support and comfort on our community.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share our Grief Guide with you. It has been created to help you understand and cope with your bereavement and grief. There are lots of articles, resources and real stories which may be helpful to you right now.

Please do keep reaching out - you are not alone.

I feel exactly the same. We had been married for over 57 years together as a couple for 60. Tony was diagnosed with aggressive lung cancer in January and died at the end of February. I can’t get back to before he was ill and the good happy times. We were so upset over some of his care we have gone thro PALS but they’ve actually made it worse for us. Very apologetic and lessons have been learned. But that doesn’t help us. Our two sons were denied visiting as some of the covid restrictions were still in place. and it’s because they hadn’t acknowledged he should have been on the pathway. If they’d fine their job properly the boys could have had a last visit with him. How on earth do we get over that ? I’ve had counseling and still am and it has helped in that I’m still here. Without it I would just have faded away. I go out have friends volunteer work in a school sometimes but it’s like I’m watching me in a film and doesn’t feel real. Inside I’m screaming outside no tears ever. The pain and loss is too deep. It’s 35 weeks now since he died. Can’t believe how long it is and I still feel shocked by it