I am finding this third year without my beloved husband totally unbearable
I’m so sorry you’re feeling so bad. I think it’s largely a myth that there’s supposed to be this straightforward progress that sees the first year being truly horrible, and getting better in subsequent years. I’ve just gone into my third year of widowhood, and aspects of the second year were certainly, as you say, unbearable. I think it speaks to what a mortal bloody wound this is - you have been so hurt. I hope you find ways to make it at east a little bearable sometimes.
Love and understanding,
Thank you so much for understanding Louise! Love to you too!