Hi I’m new on here so please excuse me if I repeat things that you have all ready heard my wife died a few years ago and yes I miss her very much and I keep her in my heart I talk to her every night about my day and I find it does help I would be intrested to hear if anyone does the same .


Hey Andy, it says on your profile your wife died 20years ago… And after all that time you still talk to her… That’s really lovely :blush: did you never wish to meet another woman?
I can’t even begin to imagine 20 years without your loved one… How long after she passed did you find you could go a day without crying… A week… A month…

But all that aside Welcome to this lovely community, it’s sad what brought us here but lovely we have people that understand us, people that are kind and share stories with.

Good morning lost limbo I tried to date other women but I don’t know it just didint seem to work out I think I’m a bit shy talking to other women and deep down it feels wrong I’m seeing another women my son tells me that Julie would be pleased that I’m dating and being happy things that do upset me is a certain songs which remind me of her or memories

It’s been 16 months since my husband died and I too speak to him every night, telling him what has happened each day and it usually ends up me crying. One thing I have realised is that I was always looked on as the strong one but that’s changed but I think it was because I was the strong one because if anyone said anything negative about my husband or family I would be there corner, but now I don’t have anyone to stick up for as my family have there own family to stand up for them. It’s very lonely out there. I miss him so much and it should have been our 50th wedding anniversary next month. It’s still our our 50th anniversary he’s just not here to celebrate it with me.

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Hi lostsoul I’m sorry for your loss I know its hard I try every day to battle against the loneliness I’m like you I have a son but he is married and got his own life to live I try not to bother them to much although I do see them every fortnight and spend time with them I go out for walks so I see people I know it sounds strange but it’s just nice to see other people and it takes away the loneliness for a while

Hi Lostsoul,

I have also tried the dating with staggered success I have to say.

But now in a serious relationship which is a lovely place to be but of course very different after almost 40 years with the same woman.

It is tough to make change and I guess it`s something you either want to do or not but there is no right way or right time in my opinion…well the right time is when it feels right for you.

Dont forget that its also difficult for the other party to take on our loss which they have to partly do.

Loneliness is an awful place to be but these messages make it a little more bearable.

Keep well and positive.


You are spot on about the loneliness. I don’t feel I am good company right now. Does anyone else feel like they spend all of their time talking about or managing their grief?

Couldn’t stop talking about it for quite a while which for some I believe became wearing for them.
Ultimately this is our journey and unless they have had the experience others simply cannot deal with it.
For me my wife’s family were in total denial for over 5 years which translated into little or no support for me.
I am a generally positive person so dealt with it in a positive way which may have appeared to some to be in caring… what do they know!!
Yes I needed to speak out a lot to many people to help the grieving process which in the whole really helped but now its up to me.
Keep talking.