Hi, I just wanted to say hello and introduce myself. I lost my husband very suddenly on 4th May. He died in his sleep and do not yet know why. We have two children aged 14 & 10 and they are the only reason I get up in the morning. We had the funeral on Tuesday and now I feel worse than ever. I think organising the funeral and making sure the children were ok helped me through those first 3 weeks and now reality has kicked me in the guts.

I have so much to sort out and I feel completely overwhelmed right now. My brain won’t let me think too far into the future.

Anyway, that’s me. I just wanted to say hi for now.

Hi Ruthie, so heartbreaking to lose the love of your life, your soul mate, your confidant, your best friend ever. People on this web site all know what you are going through it’s absolute torment, grief is overwhelming, I too found I could cope the first couple of weeks, then wham I was blubbering all the time, any little thing his cap on the chair, his toothbrush the silence is the worst, I know you have two young children but let them know how you are feeling, let it all out, I talk to my daughter, oh your dad loved chilli for dinner, I talk to all my children about their dad, of course they are grieving too. I am 42 days done the line, since my hubby passed away, I think of him constantly, wake up it’s there, going to bed it’s there all throughout the day, it never goes away. But it does get a little better, as time passes, I can now talk to people about my husband without blubbering. Not to say I don’t cry anymore, it’s still raw. I don’t think of the future, just slowly go through the day, taking my time if I don’t want to go out I don’t, if I want and sit and ponder I do. It’s all about you and your children now as difficult as it is without your husband. I got out all my photos, and filled a large photo frame of pictures of us together, it took me all day. But I got real joy doing it! Through the tears Memories. Do what you feel is right when your ready, I still have a long way to go. Accept the support of anyone who gives it to you. This website will help you, as we all know what your going through. Take care big hugs xx

Hi Ruthie , I’m so sorry to hear of the recent loss of your husband. I’m sure you and your children have many happy memories to help you through the coming days. I lost my husband in October last year so can understand a little of how you are feeling. I don’t post very much on this community group site but do gain much comfort from reading other people’s stories and realising that experiencing the same feelings as me gives me much needed support and helps me. I just wanted to let you know I’m thinking of you and the children
L x

I lost my husband suddenly on 7 May - we came home from work to find him. Like you I doubt we are over the shock. He was only 60 - but we had been together for 40 years so I feel that half of me has disappeared. My children are older so have been totally supportive. My brain is not functioning either - but think the shock has a lot to do with it.
They say it will get easier - but cannot see how yet. These forums have been a lifeline as I do not want to burden my children with my fears for a lonely future and everyone is happy to talk. Welcome - I hope you find this forum as helpful as I do.
Trisha xx

Hi Ruthie, I am really sorry about your loss and I know what a struggle it is. I lost my partner of 30 years suddenly last November. He was 49. I did find everything overwhelming in the first few weeks, doing paperwork and arranging the funeral. I miss him so much, everyday, but I am now beginning to do things in the garden, looking after his roses he loved so much. Just take your time, do what you want to do. Love to you and the children.
Janet x