Here it comes again……..

Hello everyone, thank you for reading my post.
I’m having a really bad week-end, can’t seem to stop this awful feeling in the pit of my stomach and the tears just keep falling……
I lost William, my darling husband, 7 months ago. He was my whole world, we worked together from home and did everything together. He was always there to hold my hand and we were very much in love.
I haven’t felt this sad for a week or two, but here it comes again…… the dreadful heartache.
Family and friends have been a wonderful support to me over the past few months, but now I feel that everyone thinks I should have “moved on”. I truly am trying to cope, and I keep mega busy, but I’m finding it difficult to fill the countless lonely hours.
Thank you again for listening to me, I am sure others within this online community know how I am feeling?
Elaine x

Hi Elaine,

I’m so sorry that you lost your husband recently and that you’re having a bad week-end. My dad would understand how you’re feeling. He and my Mum were together for 45 years. He was very lonely & would often ring me in tears. He also kept mega busy during the day but found the evenings a struggle. In time he did cope a lot better but even now will still ring me crying and missing my Mum very occassionally.

I often hear the phrase ‘moving on’ in posts on the site. The grief we feel when we lose a loved one is very personal and takes time. There should be no pressure to do or act in any way you don’t feel ready for or want to. Friends and family mean well when they say these things.

There will be many others in the community who will understand what you’re feeling.

Please keep talking to us & take care. Trudy x

Hello Trudy, thank you for taking the time to reply to me, it means so much to me. I hope your Dad is okay, 45 years is a very long time and he must miss your Mum terribly, as you must do too.
You sound like a wonderful daughter and I’m send you and your Dad love and best wishes Elaine x

Hello Elaine,
I’m sorry youre having such a bad time at the moment.
Don’t worry about what others think unless this has happened to them they have no idea how awful it is.
Take your time to grieve for your husband in your own way.
Like you, since losing my partner suddenly I’m finding it so difficult to fill the countless hours, the evenings and weekends are the worst when there is nobody to share a joke or piece news with or cook a meal for. It sll seems so.pointless now.
I hope life gets a little easier for you soon. Take care Jx

Thank you so much for taking the time to write to me, I appreciate it so much. Your reply was so thoughtful and kind and I am sending you a big hug and I hope that you find the strength to cope with your sad loss.
As you say, no one really understands unless they have actually been in this situation. Its not a happy place. My life was so brilliant, and on reflection I feel I really did have it all, so I must feel grateful for that ~ Now, its impossible to find many positives, its very different. I am feeling a little better this evening, thank you for your support. Elaine x

Hi After you
I am so sorry you’ve lost William, and that you are having a bad weekend. Weekends are always the worst for me as that was the time we enjoyed one another’s company the most and family and friends are doing just the same now and I seem to be very alone. The highs and very lows will get better. We don’t move on how can we when there is nowhere to move to, our world has completely changed I wish the people who tell us to ‘Get a grip’ or ‘go out more’ could tell us how, they’re in a different world to us, even if they mean well they just don’t and cannot understand if they haven’t experienced losing the closest person in our lives.

Don’t try to hard just be kind to yourself and take each day as it comes. Love and hugs Chriss xx

Hi Chris, Thank you so much for replying to my post, your kind words are a source of strength to me, and I appreciate you taking the time to write.
I’m a little better today, Monday, but I dread it when the overwhelming sad feelings take hold of me, I just fall apart.

I will take your advice and be kind to myself and try to take a day at a time.
Thank you again Chris, I am sending you love & hugs too and wish you all the very best.
Elaine xx

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